November 12, 2009

Have Laptop, Will Tan

Except for the part about tanning. I do not tan. I either slazz myself in SPF a million or I turn pink and peel like a crackly shrimp. The Irish, we are a BOG people.

Anyway, I am leaving for the airport. I am taking the next 5 days off from blogging as I am trying to get 3 - 4K a day drafted, and if I blog it won’t happen. ALSO I signed up for NaNo under a SUPER SECRET name to get access to the enticing blue word count bar which is fun to watch as it moves inexorably RIGHT. Also, it makes me accountable, as my husband can go look and SEE it slide right and know that I am actually WORKING at Super Fabulous Resort and not just charging 120 dollar citrus sea salt toe refreshment pedicures to his Amex. Larlarlar!

Since I already started working on THE OTHER MOSEY SLOCUMB, I am definitely CHEATING at NaNoWriMo, but on the blue bar I am only counting words I write in November, so it isn’t AWFUL cheating. If you are NaNoing and want to know my SUPER SECRET NaNo name, here is a a purely awful Golem-Bilbo style riddle I dreamed up in less than 45 seconds, and I SO apologize for the embarrassing forced rhyme at the end:

My first fronts for “Folks,” Or did back in the day.
My second? Its mirror in every way
Letter for letter, same second and first,
My whole is a streetname, like “cops” --- only worse.
And just when you think you have got it, my Wench,
I smile slyly and tell you, “The spelling is French.”

Agnes Scotties, Momwriters, my BoBly WOWers, crit partners and TOM – you know my secret name. PLEASE NO CHEATING and NO TELLING OTHERS or spilling in the comments so they can cheat. I want to see if some riddle genius can actually SOLVE that mess above. It is close to impossible. But .... you read that and manage to know my SECRET NANO NAME, you too can supersecretly check up on me and make sure I am not supersecretly slacking on the beaches. There may be mysterious other prizes as well, but nothing great because I want you to try to DO IT FOR LOVE AND FUNSIES. I love riddles. It is a sickness.

So no blog updates til Tuesday, but...tweets? 140 characters? THAT I maybe can manage! I am going to try to TWEET from my cell, which should show up in the widget here on the blog. Tweety Twial and error. Tweet by fire. I hereby and forthwith eschew all manuals, FAQs, helpful friends and How To pages. I shall Tweet by the skin of my chinny-chin-chin via Google searches, skim-reading, and my most especial pet favorite cussings I save solely for moments when I am stymied by technology, and with that I give a shouty outy HULLO to my new DELTA-FRIENDS in the runway line when we are still allowed to use electronics!

I am going to be a fun seatmate.

If I do not Tweet, you will know my phone defeated me. Also, let me apologize in advance just in case I destroy the earth’s oceans or accidentally create sentient life as I trial and error my tipsy-topsy way into new technology. I LOVE New Technology actually, but I hate learning curves. Oh well, at least I am fighting off my inner old crank, the anti-boob one who spent yesterday standing in a furry bathrobe hollering, YOU KIDS GET OFF MY LAWN and adding “shenanigans” to my vocabulary.


Monday I impulse bought the above book to read on the plane---that fantastic cover caught my eye, and I like the title: Dismantled. I flipped it open when I got home just to read a page or two and four hours later I closed it, having gulped and gobbled the whole dern thing and not gotten any work done. HEH. I was plumb worn out. I can’t wait to read it again because the author has got a HUGE VOICE, but I could not slow down and listen to her.

I was zooming so fast due to the unendurable WHAT NEXT factor that I am sure I missed lovely turns of phrase and wordplay—such voice. But also plot, and you know I like a big scoop of plot. I haven’t been so riveted since I discovered Tana French. Someone compared it to The Secret History, one of my favorite books of all time, and, yeah, I can see that, too. I was talking about the book with Karen and it turns out I know the author’s agent---really great guy. I dropped him a line, and I hope I can get her here for a 3Q.

Okay, pray me traveling mercies, wish me mighty word count, and I shall see you on the tweet-side, Oh very most Best of all possible Beloveds.

Posted by joshilyn at November 12, 2009 6:07 AM

Eh well, won't be seeing ME on the Tweet side, Luddite that I am.

I love how you describe the reason for having to reread that book someday, I do that ALL the time. Like inhaling a bag of chips so fast you hardly got to taste them.

I am bummed that I missed my window of opportunity to join the boobie comments!

Good luck with The Mighty Word Count!

Posted by: Brigitte at November 12, 2009 6:42 AM

How did you miss the window? Comments close after 7 days!

Posted by: Joshilyn at November 12, 2009 6:48 AM

Because nobody looks and discusses on the old comments once a vibrant, beautiful, shiny NEW post goes up! ;-D

Posted by: Brigitte at November 12, 2009 7:40 AM

Hee, Bridget, I thought the same thing, but went to read anyway because I saw there were new comments.
But then, I couldn't think of anything to add. :D

Posted by: JulieB at November 12, 2009 9:13 AM

Have a safeity safe trip. Crank out that word count because I'm excited to read this book. Even if it will be more than a year from now.

Oh, and take pictures.

Posted by: Nikki at November 12, 2009 11:41 AM

Well, golly. I lurve Tana French, did NOT lurve The Secret History, DID lurve McMahon's Promise Not To Tell. So, I think two out of three signs point to YES, I need this book. Thanks for helping me work that out.

Posted by: Badger at November 12, 2009 3:20 PM

Well, let's leave it as I found you. Was smart, but had some issues with the riddle itself which I will confess to you after everyone else has played in order to not mess up the game further. So, not really sure I qualify for hobbitness. :)

Posted by: JulieB at November 13, 2009 9:03 AM

I got it in ten seconds! And the riddle was excellent, dear owlkin.

Posted by: Gray James at November 14, 2009 10:28 PM

How goes the word count? Personally, I just checked the word count on something I was writing (not for NaNoWriMo) and the count was exactly 666. I think that might be a bad sign.

Posted by: Haley at November 15, 2009 7:49 PM

I miss you already.

Posted by: IFoM at November 16, 2009 4:58 PM