September 17, 2009

Open At Your Own Risk

Maisy has a stuffy she is particularly fond of these days, a floppy-legged dog named Susie. Maisy Miss Jane is, quite frankly, mostly PAST stuffies these days. We are seven. We are much too sophisticated and worldy for stuffies, insert your own mildly superior sniffing noise here, thanks so much.

She prefers fashionista Barbies and baby dolls for playing marathon games of house with her friend Annelise. But Susie is special. Susie came to our big family beach week as the property ERIN VIRGINIA, the most beautiful and glamorous and amazing teenager cousin all the world, and ERIN gifted Maisy Jane with Susie. Maisy has taken to toting Susie everywhere, for months now.

Most recently, Suzie has become a HAT. Yes. A hat. Maisy likes to put Susie on her head, two floppy legs hanging down to frame her forehead, two dandling in the back. Maisy says it helps her practice balance for ballet. This may be actually be accidentally true ---Susie used to slide right off, but after several weeks of this, Masiy Jane can march around and play and pick up her room and feed the cats, all with Suzie perched unmoving on her head.

Maisy would like to wear Susie all the time, but ALAS! The school Maisy attends has uniforms and a dress code. Maisy pointed out that there is not a specific prohibition against wearing dog-shaped floppy hats, but because I am unreasonable and a terrible ogre-mother, I feel that the wearing of Susie violates the spirit, if not the letter, of the law. No Susie-heads at school.
So I can KINDA GET THE LOGIC behind what happened this morning.I see the thought processes in Maisy Jane's little, precious, and endlessly innocent head. In Maisy-land, Susie is a HAT. Right? Got that? Keep that thought in your head as we continue.

I came downstairs, yawning, and Scott said, “Look at what your daughter left on the coffee table.”

I snapped a pic of it, but I try (most days) to keep this blog PG-13. Yes, my novels are for grown-ups, definately some 17 and up content in many of them, but you have to go to the grown up lit section and open the cover and read --whereas here, I know the kids of some of my friends visit, etc etc, so. PG-13. Therefore, I am not going to just STICK UP the picture. You must click to see, and you click at your own risk.

Oh my. I took the...project down immediately, and clearly I need to have a talk with my daughter about appropriate stuffy behavior, maybe take her to a FARM, but Scott says no. Scott says that for a brief moment, Susie was ART. I tend to respond in a more Supreme Courtish manner and say, I can’t define porn, but I DERN WELL KNOW IT WHEN I SEE IT. Scott insists that it was an ART INSTALLATION, but I think he lost all credibility for that argument when he suggested that it should have been titled, "This is my dog, Randy."


Posted by joshilyn at September 17, 2009 10:08 AM

Clearly, she gave her piggy a hat. Piggy is vaguely head-shaped, after all. When she arrived home from school today, Susie would already have a head-shaped divot in her tummy. Perfect for Miss Maisy's innocent little head.

Posted by: Vicki at September 17, 2009 10:26 AM

But. . .but. . .but. . .isn't Susie just being a pig-hat?

No. Wait. That's a pink pig!

Oh my. Is Susie now gay? Should I welcome her to the Family?

Cuddling! Yeah, that's what's going on! Cuddling!

Posted by: Fran at September 17, 2009 10:27 AM

Bwaahaahahah! I pink fluffy heart your family! Yes, you have married Calvin's dad. Definitely. And Maisy Jane is hysterical! You two are in SOOO MUCH TROUBLE when she hits her teens -- I can't wait to read your blogs about it :)

I have to agree with Vicki, though. Pink Pig looks like a hat-stand/wig head to me! Perfect place for Susie to sit. Or maybe Pink Pig is practicing her balance for ballet, too?

Posted by: Beth R at September 17, 2009 10:44 AM

So funny ! Love the click at your own risk!

Posted by: JB at September 17, 2009 12:09 PM

Art... It's all in the eye of the beholder.

Posted by: Mr. Husband at September 17, 2009 3:35 PM

You have a dirty mind. Of course, I like that in a person....

Posted by: Mir at September 17, 2009 3:46 PM

So funny. This reminds me of a game we played as kids called Pigmania. It was like a dice game, except instead of dice you rolled two little pig figurines and got points depending on the positions in which they landed. If one pig landed on top of the other, it was called Makin Bacon and you got major points.

Hmm. Perhaps this wasn't a kid-friendly game...

Posted by: Katie B at September 17, 2009 3:49 PM

Definitely art. I'm with Calvin's/Maisy's dad. ;)

Posted by: Kim at September 17, 2009 10:57 PM

Oh my!

I'm not sure which is more disturbing - the fact that Maisy thinks Susie is a hat, or that you have such a filthy mind (and I thought the exact same thing as you when I looked at the picture!! LOL!)

Definitely art. But NSFW. ;o)

Posted by: Jen at September 18, 2009 7:08 AM

Perhaps Susie has some sexual-identification issues going on . .

Posted by: Brigitte at September 18, 2009 7:45 AM

Oh, Miss Maisy Jane.

It's okay, though. One of my dearest friends is convinced that her seven year old is going to grow up and be an, ahem, exotic dancer, because every time they go to a playground she's up on the poles and then hangs there holding on with just her legs.

You might be lucky Maisy just thought Mr. Pig was a hat stand.

Posted by: erinanne at September 18, 2009 10:29 AM

I HAVE Pig Mania at home :)

Posted by: Beth R at September 18, 2009 12:05 PM