February 11, 2009

Random Rolls and OH! Look! I am a Nominatrix


OKAY --- I really meant it when I said I had a virtual dice program and I could make my dice have as MANY sides as I wanted them to have. I can tell from the comments that some of you thought I was just going to actually pick my favorite entry, but beloveds, too many of you are my very favorite, so it makes playing favorites difficult. Although I DO have to give props for the answers “Jealous Elmo” and “DENNY CRANE!” HEE!

The multi-sided roller program is part of the online game I play. To make the dice work, you simply type /roll and then you put in the number of sides you want your dice to have. SO! There were 128 entries. I logged in my favorite World of Warcraft toon, an undead priest named Reviva. SHe is cute, but her rotty parts show and her bones poke through her clothes… think of her as Vanna White, except dead. Once Reviva was logged in, I typed /roll 1 – 128 and here is the result!

revivarolls.jpg

Counting up from the bottom, twice, it seems to me that comment #100 is this one:

“Obviously it's Elphaba from Wicked. I mean, right?
Posted by Miss Monky at February 9, 2009 11:55 PM”

Gratz to Miss Monky, and if the unwed and e-less primate lady would be so kind as to send her mailing addy to Joshilyn at Joshilyn Jackson dot com, I will send out her prize (and Dynagirl’s) no later than Monday of next week. Barring floods and/or deadly locusts and/or forgetting to go to the post office.)

Yes, yes, yes, it is a SHREK, and if I were NOT using a random roller, if I was INDEED going to play favorites I would have disqualified EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU WRETCHED SMARTY-PANTSES who got that right. Not because I do not appreciate your smarty-pantsy-ness. I do, I do, and PS, I want you on MY Cranium team next time. I would disqualify you on the basis of you made it look as if Karen’s description actually had a TEENY bit of merit. Which, no. Just NO.

Shrek has two eyes (And by the time my dad told her had two we had less than ten seconds to guess, Best Beloveds!) is not an animal (he is a monster or ogre---DONKEY is an animal!) And he is MUCH better known for his MOVIES than the Broadway play that very few of us here knew existed. But apparently it DOES exist. Even so, a LOT of you got that it was SHREK, somehow, via black magic I presume, so I spose I must remit a floppy handful of grudging and extremely insincere props to Karen. * golf clap*

MEANWHILE something really nice happened to me yesterday.
I found out that the audio version of THE GIRL WHO STOPPED SWIMMING if a finalist for the Audie Award in the category of Narration by the Author or Authors

I called everyone I ever met to tell them yesterday, and Maisy overheard me gabbling and said, “Mommy, are you going to WIN?”
and I said, “No, baby.”
And she said, “Why won’t you WIN though?”

Well…I’ll tell you why. The nominees are:
Maya Angelou, Poet, historian, Grammy winner, genius, and national treasure.
David Sedaris, Humorist, multiple #1 NYT Bestelling memoirist and spooky-level smarty-pants
Cokie Roberts, Emmy Award winning journalist and household name political commentator
Maria Shriver, award winning journalist, first lady of California and Oh, PS, A Kennedy.
Then, um, me: Quasi-rural Georgia wife and mother and maker of lemon-raspberry pound cake who has written three (excuse me) rather good novels.

HEE! I look at this list and I begin singing the Sesame Street Song. “Which one of these things is not like the others…”

I tried to explain this to Maisy---GAH! you try explaining who Cokie Roberts is to a 6 yrear old--- and she thought it over VERY carefully and said, “I bet you come in SECOND though, Mommy.”

ME TOO! Or not. This is one of those cases where, HELLSYA it IS actually an honor to be nominated---I never thought I would see my name in a list with anyone else in this particular list. I’m a little floored and extremely pleased.

Posted by joshilyn at February 11, 2009 8:39 AM
Comments

That is an amazing list.

UH. MAZE. ZING.

And just WOW!!!

Although I see your point, what with all of the t.v./literary royalty on the list, that you might not win--there IS this thing called "a dark horse." Or in your case, "a southern chestnut mare."

Do not underestimate your "Audie" skills--nor Maisy's prophetic statements.

And even if you DON'T win, you know we like you best.

Posted by: Roxanne at February 11, 2009 9:03 AM

WOW! That is so cool! I don't usually comment (unless there's a prize, which I never win), but I had to congratulate you on making it onto a list like that.

P.S. When I saw where somebody else said Shrek I figured they were probably right, but I NEVER would have thought of it myself, from those clues. If that makes you feel any better.

Posted by: Julie G. at February 11, 2009 9:07 AM

WOW! I am SO proud of you!!!! And I KNOW you! You're the most famous person that I've ever met!
Maybe you could challenge David Sedaris to a jello-wrestling match for top honor. Somehow I'm thinking Maya Angelou wouldn't take you up on it.
(((hugs)))

Posted by: liz at February 11, 2009 9:24 AM

Wowwie! Congratulations! :)

Posted by: JulieB at February 11, 2009 9:24 AM

That's some illustrious company indeed. But I think Maisy is wrong. You WILL so win. Because the judges will look at you from their lofty podium and say 'Ah look at her with her puppy dog eyes and winning smile, let's give her something. Those other peeps have already won stuff' and poof it's yours.

Posted by: pam at February 11, 2009 9:27 AM

you are definitely in with an impressive list of people. if I got to vote, you would so totally win. but it is "an honor just being nominated," right? =)

Posted by: elizabeth at February 11, 2009 9:34 AM

Congratulations!!! Yes, you are in very good company and I hope you win. As good as the company is, however, if any of them won it would be like another Steelers win at the Superbowl *yawn and finger twirl*

Posted by: Stephanie at February 11, 2009 9:47 AM

Congratulations on your award nom, Joshilyn. VERY impressive indeed. I'm quite proud to have known you when. 8-)

Posted by: matt elliott at February 11, 2009 10:02 AM

Well, that is a very impressive list. And that includes you! But wow, I can't imagine what it must feel like to see your own name on a list with Maya Angelou and David Sedaris and Maria Shriver. Cokie Roberts? Eh. Not one of my favorites.

Posted by: Aimee at February 11, 2009 10:22 AM

That is SO fabulous to be nominated in that company!! Your narration is as noteworthy as the plummy deep vocal tones of Maya Angelou reading from her book! I have heard her speak, and, wow.

Posted by: Genevieve at February 11, 2009 11:04 AM

Congratulations on the nom. That is some company you are keeping. Personally, I think you deserve to be on that list every bit as much as they do.

Now, I really, really need the recipe for lemon-raspberry pound cake...

Posted by: Jill W. at February 11, 2009 11:11 AM

Many congratulations on the nomination! Having listened to exactly NONE of the specific potential winners, I cannot compare their relative merits, but I see no reason why you should not be a reasonable contender (Maya Angelou has an AWFULLY nice voice,though). But if you were to SEND the judges some lemon raspberry poundcake, it would be a definite plus for you, I'm sure. I would feel very warmly towards anyone who sent ME any!

I, too, would love the recipe!

Posted by: Diane (TT) at February 11, 2009 11:22 AM

WOW... Just WOW! I'd have to say you already won just by being part of that list! That said, I still see no reason that you can't "officially" win, too!

Posted by: melanie at February 11, 2009 12:01 PM

Here again because I, like everyone else, would love the recipe for the raspberry lemon poundcake. Now THAT is a NOM!!!

Posted by: Roxanne at February 11, 2009 12:07 PM

Sooon you'll be putting those other adjective behind "Audie Winner".

Congratulations!

Posted by: Mit at February 11, 2009 12:09 PM

What a list! That has to feel good. Congratulations.

Posted by: Lisa Milton at February 11, 2009 12:10 PM

That's a mighty powerful list! Congratulations! So which one "is not like the others"? Looks to me like they all belong there including you.

Posted by: kathy at February 11, 2009 12:24 PM

Why is it the undead have such horrible posture? Probably all the bone-rot.

Posted by: Laura L at February 11, 2009 12:30 PM

Congrats! That IS quite a list. And you deserve to be there. :)

Posted by: Mir at February 11, 2009 12:36 PM

Its an impressive list to be sure but I'll tell you these few things: I don't read any of their blogs. And none of them have nursed a sick Maisy. So I'm still rooting for you to win and I bet Maisy is too. How many kids can say that an Audie award nominee reads them their bedtime stories? Ok, a few Shwarzenegger kids but no one at Maisy's school. What I'm saying is, to the people that matter (looks like I humbly included myself in there), you are already a winner and it would just be redundant for you to get an official prize.

Posted by: Em at February 11, 2009 12:40 PM

Wow! Congratulations! That's some company you keep.

Posted by: Holly at February 11, 2009 1:31 PM

I found your books through listening to Between, and your Audie skills are impressive. I was commuting very far at that point and so had listened to just about everyone (some of the other noms included) and you were the most entertaining and interesting BY FAR, and I am not just saying that. Good luck!

Posted by: Beth at February 11, 2009 1:34 PM

Congrats! I too think you could TOTALLY win! Like Liz, you are the most famous person I've ever met and while Maya Angelou and Maria Shiver are fabulous ladies, I KNOW they are not as personable and witty as you! Maybe the next contest prize will be a copy of the audio version! Hint, hint.

Posted by: Janie at February 11, 2009 1:47 PM

Congratulations! That is an amazing list to be on--but you deserve it. Even though I've read your books, I haven't heard the audio versions, and it just occurred to me that I should listen to them.

Posted by: Alison at February 11, 2009 2:06 PM

Truly rarified company you keep, Ms. Joshilyn! But I must agree that your reading is very entertaining -- it's the icing on the cake you are reading. (Ha! I is not a riter. Clearly.)

(And I can't believe that someone up in the comments called you a horse. Really now. Bless Roxanne's heart, I'm sure she meant it in the nicest way ;-) )

Posted by: Lulu at February 11, 2009 2:20 PM

Ooo congrats! and, as has been pointed out, you're going to mention lemon raspberry pound cake and NOT share the recipe? Are you feeling okay?

Posted by: Jess at February 11, 2009 2:23 PM

Congrats Joss! I have not heard the audio version of TGWSS but I'm sure it is well deserving of this nomination.

I agree with Jess...no linky to the recipe for said Lemon-Raspberry Pound Cake? Pout.

Posted by: Tammy at February 11, 2009 2:46 PM

Hell yeah, one of these things is not like the others--that would be you. This year's winnah. :)

Congratulations!

Posted by: hope101 at February 11, 2009 3:19 PM

Okay - so flat footed green with envy my toes are curling. Just when I haven't given up all prideful attachements to awards (see- Pulitzer) and decided that the main thing was to tell good stories to great people - just when I was just about a prideless word MONK (I happen to like monk robes better than nun habits) just when . . . you gotta go get nominated for an award with the likes of this stellar people. Jos, so happy for you I could spit and whistle dixie at the same time.
Seriously- amazingly grand news that should make it worth eating those chocolate cupcakes with white swirls (the whole pack) and not counting the ww points. My only other feeling about this is You are much, much, much tooooo young to be cast in the company of these people.

Best wishes for the continued rise of your stellar star - up, up, and away!

River

Posted by: River Jordan at February 11, 2009 3:49 PM

Oh, please know that I meant it in the NICEST of ways.

First of all, I looked it up to make sure that I was calling the beautiful reddish horse by the right name. . .we do NOT want to call one of our favorite authors a DARK horse when she is much, much prettier than that.

Secondly, Joss LOVES horses, so I thought she, herself, would not mind being compared to one--especially a gorgeous one.

Under dog was DEFINITELY out of the question, and dark horse didn't seem quite right, but a beautiful, sleek, glossy chestnut beauty--now THAT fits the bill. Especially if she races around all of the other contenders in the home stretch. I'll send her a bouquet of gerbera daisies myself--though not in the shape of a horseshoe.

Posted by: Roxanne at February 11, 2009 4:01 PM

You are in VERY IMPRESSIVE company, there. Congratulations on the nomination! You make this Georgia girl proud!

Posted by: pendy at February 11, 2009 8:10 PM

Wow! Joss, you are such a rock star ;) And I like horses lol

Posted by: Heather at February 11, 2009 8:17 PM

Dang. Pretty soon you'll be too good to hang out with us hangers on.

Can you give us the recipe for the pound cake first?

Congratulations!!!

Posted by: Jen at February 11, 2009 9:13 PM

Wow, congrats! Illustrious company indeed, you should be VERY proud.

I must say though: much as I like *your* books, David Sedaris made me laugh so hard I peed my pants a little bit (was that TMI?)

Posted by: babelbabe at February 11, 2009 9:30 PM

short answer... as they say in World of Warcraft:

GRATS!!

Posted by: purrmah at February 11, 2009 9:59 PM

If you get to meet David Sedaris, who makes me laugh until I cry and whose books I listen to over and over and OVER on my iPod, I'll be...I don't know. Jealous. Impressed. Jealously impressed. Impressively jealous.

Which, you know, I already am. Mostly impressed, of course. Because you rock.

And I didn't even KNOW you did your own audiobooks! That is SO cool in and of itself, awards and potential Sedaris encounters aside. You didn't read gods, did you? Because I listened to that on audio, but I don't think it was you.

In any case. Mazel tov.

Posted by: TC at February 12, 2009 1:30 AM

CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT IS SO AMAZING! YOU ARE AMAZING!

Posted by: Nik at February 12, 2009 5:55 AM

Awesome and deserved!

Posted by: Jen at February 12, 2009 7:25 AM

Congratulations on your nomination! Awesome to be in such company (I mean both you to be the company of Maya, et al, and ME to be in YOUR company here at the blog.) I just put The Girl Who Stopped Swimming into my audible.com cart for one of my two selections for next month. So even if the inexplicable happens and you don't beat out Maya, et al, you won in my competition :-)

Posted by: kmkat at February 12, 2009 10:07 AM

Yeah! What a well-deserved honor!

Your vocal/reading skills are top-notch, Joss. Your intonation is dead-on. You convey the mood, setting, and characters in a spot-on manner. You pull the listeners/readers in and don't let them go. I love the energy you bring to TGWSS both on tape and in readings. Plus, it's a GREAT book! For my money, I think you've got a heckuva good shot at winning this. Think about it, all the audio books out there and you were noticed for this nomination. Says A LOT already!

Congratulations on the nomination! And good luck! You rock!!!

Posted by: Charmi at February 12, 2009 12:11 PM

Congrats on the nomination - you're in great company! And if you read anything like the way you write, and blog, I'm certainly not counting you out... Fantastic!

Posted by: Liz at February 12, 2009 5:35 PM

Gratz!!!!

What a great list to be on!

More importantly, ewwwww....UGLY HORDE!

*What shiny weapon is that?

FOR THE ALLIANCE!!!

Posted by: Gary in Memphis at February 12, 2009 7:17 PM

Wow ... sitting on a short list of greatness.

Just. Awesome.

Posted by: Patti at February 12, 2009 11:53 PM

THAT'S Frickin awesome!!!!! that you are in a list like that!!!!

Posted by: Julie Fisher at February 13, 2009 8:47 AM

Grats on the nom-nom, if TGWSS on audio is half as great as Between was - you're selling yourself short on your chances.

And am I the only person who also wishes to proffer congrats on your phat lewts in WoW? Assuming my armory trawling skills are not most terribad.

You write amazing books *and* you have better gear than me! *sniffles in jealous elmo stylee*

If you are bored, look up Romdjoll on the EU armory and feel instantly superior : )

Posted by: Rompompom at February 13, 2009 5:14 PM

I too would like to add my most sincere congratulations on the nomination.

Now that we all know the answer and based on the clues she gave I say it is Karens fault that you didn't make the right guess. Could she not have said swamp too???

Posted by: Linda J at February 14, 2009 10:16 AM

That is SOME list - and indeed you do belong right up there! Congrats!

Posted by: sandragale at February 14, 2009 12:27 PM

CONGRATS!!!! Now... post the recipe!!! LOL

Posted by: Trace at February 15, 2009 6:17 AM

Maisy is right. You've got 2nd sewn up! Even I, with my blinding love for your reading of Between, Georgia (I haven't listened to The Girl Who Stopped Swimming yet) don't think ANYONE can beat David Sedaris at reading. But wait. As soon as I typed that I remembered how much I loved the way you read Between, Georgia. You made me CRY, and I'd already read the book! I think you can take David Sedaris! And he was your only real challenge. I am so excited! I know someone who could beat David Sedaris. And the rest of those fancy readers.

Posted by: Leslie Noon at February 15, 2009 7:03 PM

Okay, how pathetic is it that I loved that you "got" my DENNY CRANE?
Congrats on the nomination!

Posted by: Jody Brown at February 17, 2009 8:56 AM