May 12, 2008



Scott and I were hanging out with some folks (including my friend Leffy) the other night, and they asked me what I got for Mother’s Day.

Me: Welp, Sam made me a decorative keychain with these little shells that jangle—mother of pearl, but he handpainted them. SO PRETTY! And Maisy decorated a vase and filled it with paper flowers. The flowers were made out of CUT OUTS of her WEE TEENY handprint.

Leffy: AW. What did Scott get you?

Scott: I got her a picture of some flowers.


Me: He is telling the truth. He gave me a picture of Tulips.

Leffy: Scott! You are FIRED!

Me: Of course the picture was displayed on my brand new 22 inch flat screen monitor…

Leffy: REHIRED!!!!

Hee. Geek love is the best kind of love, because it often comes with new electronic equipments.

I hope alla ya’ll other mothers got handmade delightful things from your babies! And I hope you do not have to fire your husbands. Anyone get a vacuum cleaner? Our vacuum cleaner blew up 6 days before Mother’s Day, and I was in TERROR that I would be mom-gifted with a new one. After 15 or 16 years – I lose track –he knows me so much better than that. BUT! In case he’d had a brain fart and accidentally given me the vacuum, I had a line alllll ready for him: “Oh. Thanks. I just wish you had gotten me something you had actually SEEN ME USE before.” *grin*

A monitor is a pretty high end Momday prez, BUT it was a combo---for Mother’s day AND to celebrate our upcoming 15th or 16th anniversary, slated to take place later this month. I forget what exact day, but it IS in May. HEH. I used to know these things, because the day and year were engraved on my wedding band.

But he gave me a GORGEOUS antique eternity band on our tenth anniversary, and I promptly LOST the old ring. (Yes. I know. That seems BAD. But in my defense, it was very ugly. VERY VERY VERY UGLY. Sentimental much? Why, no, thank you.) and the new one is an eternity ring so it CANNOT be engraved so therefore I think I am absolved from ever knowing what day I was marrie,d much less how many YEARS ago that was. It’s not like HE would know the exact date and year if HE didn’t have his original band with the date in it RIGHT ON HIS FINGER like a round, gold, marital CHEAT SHEET.

Also HE cannot be blamed for the ugly original band. It was the cheapest ring in thew store. I think it was like, 10 carat gold embellished with Reynolds wrap and 3 sub-atomic specs of diamond dust they got by windexing the surfaces where actual stones were cut. It was very FLAT looking and…well…ugly, but I picked it out because I was spending so much time at the barn riding at that time, and I wanted a ring that wouldn’t CATCH on stuff and IRRITATE ME when I was mucking about with ponies. So we went to a ring store and we picked his band and then I picked this SCRUTIATING ugly cheapo flat thing and we left them there to be engraved.

A week or so later, he went back to the store to get our bands, and I saw they had accidentally swapped it for this GORGEOUS flowery ring that cost about nine times as much. I looked at it and said, “HONEY! LOOK! THOSE MORONS GOT ME THE WRONG RING!” and marched it back and exchanged for the ugly one, and of course within three years I virulently hated my ring.

It took me another TWO YEARS after I started hating that ring---so a total of FIVE --- before it occurred to me that they had not made a mistake.

Me: Hey Scott, remember when the ring store gave me the wrong wedding band, and it was that flower one and not this ugly cheap one?

Him: *suddenly very busy and not looking at me* Oh. Er…Yes?

Me: Did they REALLY? Or did you just not want me to have such a butt ugly wedding ring.


Me: OOOH! WHERE????!??! Wait --- Seriously!

I finally did get him to confess. He had done it on PURPOSE and picked out a ring he thought LOOKED like me, and it was lovely and flowery and expensive and then when I started hating the ugly one I picked he got me this antique eternity ring that I ADORE and NOW I got a monitor and I EMPHATICALLY DID NOT get a vacuum. I tell you what, one of the NICEST parts about my particular bout of motherhood is that this guy is their dad, and I see all the best bits of him in our kids.

Happy Anniversary, baby. Today and whatever day our anniversary actually is.

Posted by joshilyn at May 12, 2008 2:40 PM

My ring is engraved with the date and Love, [Hisname]. I considered messing around with the punctuation a bit on his ring so it read Love Myname! You know, more command than signature. In the end, we kept our cheat sheets as originally written (but I've got the date down now and would not mind a pretty new ring without an engraving at all).

Happy Mother's Day!

Posted by: Em at May 12, 2008 3:50 PM

It's impossible for me to forget the day, since we got married on September 11, two years before the 9/11 emblazoned in everyone's minds. And this is probably indicative of my horrible practical Virgo-ness, but when my vacuum died the month before my birthday, along with the lawn mower and the fridge, I was pretty grateful when my dad offered to give me a vacuum for my birthday. When you're suddenly hit by some sort of Appliance Bermuda Triangle, something's got to give.

Happy Mother's Day! I got handmade pottery from my firstborn. I'm pretty darn lucky.

Posted by: amy at May 12, 2008 10:42 PM

I always loved the mand made kidlet gifts, now I envy that my daughter gets them from my favorite grandson.

Hey don't get mad cuz' I have favorites. He's my only grandson.

Posted by: Cele at May 13, 2008 1:44 AM

My husband doesn't get me anything for Mother's Day, because I'm not his mom. At least that absolves me from getting anything for Father's Day!

My baby gave me a 2-ton concrete impression of her handprint, embedded with glass "jewels", which is now proudly on display.

Posted by: Brigitte at May 13, 2008 5:00 AM

Happy Anniversary, whatever day it is! :-)

Posted by: DebR at May 13, 2008 6:04 AM

It's 14 years, this month. The traditional 14 year gift is Ivory, but in light of the number of pets currently residing with us I have decided to forgive you for not getting me the elephant.

Posted by: Mr. Husband at May 13, 2008 8:53 AM

Oh. . .that Mr. Husband. He just never quits.

We celebrate 15 yrs. on June 12th. . .which is also our son's 7th birthday. It ceased being our anniversary 7 years ago, 'cause now that date belongs to the boy.

Posted by: Roxanne at May 13, 2008 8:57 AM

My parents can't remember their wedding date either. One year, when I was probably eight or nine years old, they had an argument about their anniversary date. Practical child that I am, I suggested that they wait until they got their anniversary card from our church and see what date the card said. None of us can remember it now. Some time at the end of April.

Posted by: liz at May 13, 2008 9:25 AM

I came on to say something like "oh, how sweet," then read Mr. Husband's comment. You did get a winner!

Posted by: Deborah P at May 13, 2008 9:32 AM

Go and get the Dyson you have been wanting. It is worth it and the price has gone down.

Posted by: jean at May 13, 2008 9:58 AM

Scott needs to focus his Geek Powers on cloning. Perhaps enlist the help of your brother, all of you can move to Crazy Farm and work on cloning. You will write the book and your brother's wife can sit around being blond and blue-eyed and Muselike, and soon there will be clones, and I can stop dreaming of widowhood.

Posted by: Elena at May 13, 2008 10:21 AM

Geek love *IS* the best!

Happy Anniversary, whenever.

Posted by: Aimee at May 13, 2008 10:29 AM

My 22nd anniversary is coming up this weekend. What is traditional for #22? Cardboard??

I did the right thing for the Mrs. for Mother's Day - gave her first-born demon spawn my credit card and told him to go get something for his Mother. His reply was classic:

"Why? It's not her birthday."

Posted by: Gary at May 13, 2008 11:50 AM

Awww, I heart Scott!

I've told you about the time Chuck's wedding band was stolen in Philly, right? Along with our house keys and a long blond hair weave, but that's another story...

Posted by: Karen Abbott at May 13, 2008 2:52 PM

That is too sweet.

Sigh. I, uh, am having your problem. See, I am tiny and have small hands, and I got married at nineteen when I had no money, so I went, "okay, thinnest silver gold band in the place = cheapest! bingo!" but now nearly 3 years later, I'm a little forlorn. It looks so... flimsy. I can't take off my engagement ring for fear of not knowing I'm still wearing anything at all. I think I would prefer something a little more, I don't know, solid on my hand, although I don't ever take off my engagement ring so I guess it doesn't matter, but then, I just want the option, you know? :) That and you can't get anything engraved on something as slim as a quarter. >.>

Posted by: Jess at May 13, 2008 7:42 PM

Some friends have the phrase "No Matter What" engraved on their rings, which is particularly meaningful since one of them has MS. And they knew it when they exchanged the rings, and they really mean it.

Posted by: Fran at May 13, 2008 11:54 PM

Love your ring story. We designed my first ring, and tried to go pick it up in LA the day of the riots. gulp. Not so. Eventually when we did get it there were a few issues, but I was glad to have it and didn't complain. A few years later, in another state, I redesigned it and added a few stones, then I lost it- not sadly and had the original remade in platinum with a larger stone. It is very unique, never catches on gloves or spandex and is now fully insured. My hubby got me NOTHING for Mother's Day, so I'm waiting for my own gift, a faux diamond antique ring to arrive this week from

Posted by: lindasands at May 14, 2008 9:11 AM

I got emails from all three my boys. Being 8000 miles away from them makes gift giving a bit of a challenge. Just knowing they were thinking about me makes me happy.
I've been lurking and reading here for a long time. I enjoy the blog and the comments I think in equal measure. I have enjoyed all of your books and shared them with all of my friends, who are now recommending them to their sisters and godmothers. I saved TGWSS for a hospital stay, so just finished it. It was the perfect thing to keep me occupied. I just wish I had been able to stretch it for the whole 10 days!

Posted by: Evalie at May 16, 2008 2:08 AM