January 25, 2008

*Snorfle*

I am still not 100% well. Still shaky and snotty and yicketty. FLU! FLU! How it lingers. No fever anymore, but I m still sluggish and poo-headed. My mom and I have a girl-getaway this weekend, and I am GOING because I have been looking forward to it for SO long, but I SHOULD go to bed. My doc says I am not contagious, so. I AM GOING.

Just a couple of vaguely amusing things to tell you before I go back to LANGUISHING and packing.

We had our parent-teacher conferences yesterday at the small Christian school my kids attend. I did not go as OF COURSE the ONLY time my doctor could fit me in was the exact time of the conferences. And I have been sick long enough for even ME to give in and go get some help-slash-drugs, plus I wanted to make sure I was not infectious.

Scott apologized for my absence and explained I was ill and at the doctor’s office. Maisy’s teacher said, “Yes. I knew Joshilyn must be under the weather. All week long, during morning prayer, Maisy has asked God to heal her mother of leprosy.”

There was a brief pause and Scott said, “My wife tends to speak in hyperbole. It is actually FLU.”

And Maisy’s teacher said, “We figured.”

If I HAD actual leprosy, I bet they would have made me a card. They are nice like that.

Last Sunday, we were SUPPOSED to have our Sunday School’s Christmas party. We always do it in January so everyone can come. It’s covered dish and we play a VICIOUS and CUT THROAT game of White Elephant, and I LOVE that party. We also all put in for a HONEYBAKED HAM. This year, one swchool had a fundraiser involving Honeybaked Coupons, and I ended up with about 35 bucks worth of free ham. SO! I said, “No need to take up a collection, we will DONATE the ham.”

Lats Saturday, we went and bought the biggest ham they had, like 70 bucks worth, and then, not TWO hours later we get a note from church saying services and ALL activities are cancelled because this is Atlanta and four drops of snow touched the earth.

Since Saturday, we have eaten ham sandwiches, Ham omelets, ham and biscuits, ham crepes, ham with corn muffins, ham and cabbage, ham ham ham ham and ham with ham sauce, hammitty hamroll, ham casserole, ham with ham, cereal and ham, ham snacks, ham and crackers, and chicken cordon bleu (you know, that chicken you make by wrapping thin boneless breast around around cheese and … HAM?)

INSULT TO INJURY: We went to a dinner on Wednesday, and GUESS WHAT THEY SERVED? Did you guess HAM? Because it was HAM.

INSULT TO INJURY 2: We got an e-mail saying the party was rescheduled for THIS Sunday, and assuring everyone that yes, HAM will be provided. Which means Scott gets to go get ANOTHER HAM, this time with no coupons. Heh.

AND INSULT TO INJURY 3: I will be out of town and MISS the party which is SUPER FUN EVERY YEAR. Oh well. I comfort myself with the thought that the dinner this weekend cannot POSSIBLY be Ham. Can it?

Posted by joshilyn at January 25, 2008 12:07 PM
Comments

I do hope you recover from your leprosy soon. Sounds positively ucky. Glad you rallied enough to post-- I was going through withdrawals from my blog fix!

Posted by: Jill at January 25, 2008 12:21 PM

I hear leprosy is hard to kick. So glad Maisy has your back.

Posted by: Lisa Milton at January 25, 2008 12:35 PM

so i take it you're not shouting out "hamalamadingdong!" in shear joy, but perhaps with a rather disgusted sneer.....

Posted by: dramamama at January 25, 2008 12:38 PM

You're such a HAM! I couldn't resist! My guess for dinner this weekend is porkchops.

~Lia

Posted by: Sarah at January 25, 2008 1:07 PM

Enter Vikings, stage left
"ham ham ham ham..." sung ad nauseum

At least it was a Honeybaked ham, which is the pinnacle of lovely ham-ness ;-)

Hope you're feeling better soon, pretty tulip!

Posted by: Beth at January 25, 2008 1:49 PM

Ugh. Not a fan of ham to begin with. Although it does make for a nice frittata, if you still have ham.

Have fun this weekend! I hear girls' weekends are just the thing for leprosy. ;)

Posted by: amy at January 25, 2008 1:55 PM

Don't forget to take your little bells to ring as you walk through town. You know, ring the bells, shout "Leprosy! Unclean! Unclean!"

I went to the dr. yesterday. Tested negative for flu. That was good, but I bet it was leprosy. Didn't test me for that. Have fun with Mama. My mom and I had a girls getaway week end last year at the Biltmore in Asheville. That's where I met you Joshilyn.

Posted by: Rhonda at January 25, 2008 2:46 PM

Did you know that Honeybaked recommends freezing what you aren't going to be using immediately. For the pollyanna view-at least you had something ready-fixed to feed your family while you were sick. That is what we ended up doing with our Christmas ham. That is when we had the flu, so the Honeybaked came in very handy as all I had to do was pop some frozen veggies in the microwave and viola dinner was done!
Have a fun weekend with your mum! Hope you feel better too!

Posted by: Heather at January 25, 2008 3:27 PM

God bless Miss Maisy! That is so sweet praying for her momma's leprosy to be cured. She's a doll!

Posted by: Heather at January 25, 2008 3:29 PM

oh my goodness! Not only did this remind me of the Spam skit by Monty Python (spam with spam, etc.), it also reminded me of the song Leprosy, sung to the tune of the Beatles' "Yesterday"--
Leprosy
all my skin is falling off of me
I'm not half the man I used to be
oh, Leprosy, is eating me...

I learned that from a youth pastor.....

Posted by: Pattie at January 25, 2008 4:11 PM

I understand that to cure leprosy you have to get a ham vaccine. Just to be on the safe side, you should probably get the mashed potatoes and gravy vaccine as well. I'm just dying here, so funny. Maisy is SO her mother's child.

It reminds me of the Open House for my son Joe's kindergarten class. Right there for all to see he'd had a teacher fill in his "I love my mom because..." paper with "because she takes me to the bullfights."
WHAT!? I so did NOT take my son to the bullfights. The rodeo - yes. Bullfights - NO!

And by the way, that ham of yours - would you eat it on a train? In the rain? With a fox? In a box? It had to be asked.

Posted by: Laume at January 26, 2008 2:29 AM

I used to LOVE that party! So sorry you can't go! I got a pizza stone at that party one year! AND I got rid of Kevin's Starship Enterprise telephone! Ahhhh, memories...good times. feel better and enjoy your girl time! ;)

Posted by: Amy-Go at January 26, 2008 1:06 PM

Glad to know it wasn't leprosy. You might have lost your typing fingers.

Posted by: liz at January 26, 2008 1:36 PM

Glad you're feeling better. Hope the girlie weekend is all that you desire, and HAM-free. Although...with all that ham, at least you didn't have to worry about dehydration, as a result of your LEPROSY. Heh. Party on!

Posted by: ZaZa at January 26, 2008 2:50 PM

Maisy for president!

Or at least advisor to Mrs. Clinton.

Posted by: parrotzmom at January 26, 2008 4:51 PM

I know I come along late with this info, but you know you can FREEZE ham in smaller chunks--or one biggun--so you don't need to die of overhamification. You knew that, right?

Posted by: Donna at January 28, 2008 10:34 PM