December 31, 2007

10 Random Thoughts About Pom Pons (and one digression)

1) Most places hyphenate the word, as in Pom-Pon. It is often called a Pompom, Pom-Pom, or Pom Pom. But truly it most correctly called a Pom-PoN. I like to just let it be two words. Pom Pon. Like that.

2) This weekend has been all about CLEANING OUT and REMOVING. Out with the old loot, in with new, and THANKS Santa, not ONE of us was this good! Maisy, I discovered, had six pom pons stuffed into her teeny closet. Blue and white from last year’s Cheerleading. Blue and Gold for this year. Red and white from a high school I visited to talk about BETWEEN, GEORGIA.

3) We put all but one pair in the box of gently used toys for the Salvation Army, because only an octopus could make a case for needing six pom pons, and octopuses don’t cheer. They are crowd-shy, under-rock dwelling sorts. Maybe if you got an octopus a Wii, he would cheer in the privacy of his, er, rock, but TRY GETTING HIM A Wii, I DARE you. None to be had, unless you want to pay 700 bucks for a Wii BUNDLE with ten games, and octopuses emphatically do NOT want to do that, especially since about 7 of the games look DUMB.

4) Maisy’s Pom Pons for Upwards Cheerleading come as these FLATTENED things that look like a small gaggle of dense plastic ropes tied together, and you have to pick apart each little pom-thread by hand and fluff them until they are nine times the size of the original rope and fluffy and attention-call-y as all get out.

5) While cleaning out the house this weekend, it was noticed that BOGGART has a couple of Pom Pons as well. They used to look like little dense beans, but apparently HE has been picking at them and fluffing them, and ALL AT ONCE, there they are. ENORMOUS! PUFFY! Tails UP, everyone, Rah Rah, Sis Boom Bah! He is QUITE proud of them and grooms them EXCESSIVELY.

6) Unless she is playing with them or heading out to Cheer practice, Maisy is required to keep her Pom Pons in the closet. Because no one wants Pom Pons on the floor of the living room.

7) Boggart puts HIS Pom Pons on the floor of the living room every time he sits down. Here he is putting them on the floor of the foyer:


8) As you can see in the photo above, Boggart has left that awkward “I am a skeletal ribbon, and my chassy is much HIGHER in the back than in the front, and my legs are too skinny and long and tangle up with each other in wonky ways so that sometimes as I make improbable leaps from one bit of furniture to the next I bork it up and smash head first into the wall and slide down and THEN try to walk off all COOL like I MEANT to do that while everyone in the room laughs so hard they shoot their beverages out their nose” phase. The Kitten-in-middle-school phase, I call it. He is now a high school boy, and getting to be quite a nice looking young man. He is sleek and lion faced and his fur dapples are a deep and satisfying shade of pumpkin, and his poinky feet and bib are pristinely white. Altogether, he is a delightfully attractive thing to LOOK at. I like to see him winding by me, or sitting, or stetching. He pleases my eyes.

I do not, however, like to look the Pom Pons. They are not an aesthetically pleasing bit of cat.

(DIGRESSION) FOR THE RECORD! Number 8 has nothing to do with Aragorn’s, er, sporting equipment and is certainly NOT a response to any comments made after the previous post, most especially not Aimee’s and TrudyJ’s. Although, now that you mention it, Viggo Mortenson is ALSO sleek and lion faced and a delightfully attractive thing to LOOK at. If we WERE talking about male bodies, which we most emphatically were NOT, then I might say Mr. Mortenson has a LOVELY one, truly, and I would not hesitate to purchase the 2008 Aragorn In Underpants calendar, and please note the words IN UNDERPANTS because I feel those words are KEY. STILL I am CERTAINLY not drawing any PARALLELS here. It is just some simple observations that no matter how lovely a um, cat is, I do not want to look at his pom pons. Resist the temptation to suspect me of perpetrating metaphor or even ANALOGY. I am JUST SAYING.

9) Let us sing a song of rights of passage. This week, our kitten has become a man cat! And also this week, I am fixing that. Come Janury 6, the only pom pons sitting out in the living room will be MAISY’s remaining pair, and HOW many TIMES have I TOLD YOU KIDS to CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELVES??!?!??!

10) As Scott and I were cleaning out yesterday, I snatched up Maisy's Pom Pons and shook them about and said the only cheer I know:

Rah Rah Ree! Kick ‘em in the knee!
Rah Rah Ralls! Kick ‘em in the OTHER knee.

Somehow, this cheer seems to be a fitting end.

Posted by joshilyn at December 31, 2007 10:04 AM

I cannot truly disagree with the idea that maybe Aragorn in Underwear would be a tad more aesthetically pleasing that Aragorn's Naughty Bits. It's just that if we're GOING to see naughty bits, I'd rather see Aragorn's than Harvey Keitel's. (Sorry, Harvey! Love ya, mean it!)

I like your cheer better than mine. The one I knew said, "Rah Rah Rass! Kick 'em in the other knee!" But "Rah Rah Ralls!" is better.

Posted by: Aimee at December 31, 2007 10:47 AM

I spit coffee this morning because I did not get the kitty pom pons until I read "Here he is putting them on the floor of the foyer" and saw the picture.

You should LOLcat him with the caption. "I see dead cats" or something because what is he doing staring at a door or wall or something.... ?

I second your "in underwear" comment because I'm not sure I want to see anyones bits... of anything... and certainly not hanging on my wall in calendar form.

Posted by: Heather Cook at December 31, 2007 11:17 AM

Such a beautiful kitty boy.

Posted by: Heather at December 31, 2007 11:17 AM

Do you notice that the Heathers always post together? That is weird. It happens at Mir's blog too...


a) we are stalking each other, or;
b) we are really the same heather.

In the case of b:

i) we have bad short term memory, or;
ii) we are split personality.

Your choice. We don't mind.

Posted by: Heather Cook at December 31, 2007 11:19 AM

QUICK before the year ends, blog about and pimp my Litblogs group! I require it! Otherwise, moon boots be upon your head!

Posted by: Lydia at December 31, 2007 11:30 AM

Rah rah ree, kick em in the knee!

Rah rah rass, kick em in the other knee!

I hate that I now know pom-poms are actually pom pons. I much prefer pom-poms. Crud.

Posted by: timmi at December 31, 2007 12:09 PM

Hooray for the kitten's right of passage! Er yea...something like that. When they start to jiggle its time for them to go!

also...I would LOVE a Viggo Mortenson in underpants calendar. I only have the LoTR:Return of The King poster however.

Happy Holidays and Happy New Year!

Posted by: Sarah at December 31, 2007 4:42 PM

Rah Rah REE! I got a WII!

(diabolical laughter)


Posted by: Amy-Go at December 31, 2007 6:52 PM

Rah Rah REE! I got a WII!

(diabolical laughter)


Posted by: Amy-Go at December 31, 2007 6:54 PM

Quite fond of that cheer myself.

Posted by: Heather at December 31, 2007 7:20 PM

Who knew that reading about a soon to be pom ponless Boggart would be so cheer-ing? When life gets you down...always look on the bright side of life, and give a whistle.

Happy New Year...sis boom bah.

Posted by: Cele at December 31, 2007 8:32 PM

After two Newcastles, I am QUITE TICKLED . . . and just have to say this is a blog entry worthy of Hall of Fame status.
Do you have one of those categories?
You should.
Happy New Year Joshilyn!

Posted by: Dana at December 31, 2007 9:21 PM

brilliant. just brilliant.

i wish i had something brilliant to add so i could be as brilliant as you. alas, i am not. and i'm not even heather.


Posted by: janet at January 1, 2008 1:20 PM

That was a Penetrating Metaphor, not a perpetrating one. hehehe
Happy New Year, Joss!

Posted by: Elena at January 1, 2008 2:09 PM

I contemplated calling my roommate to tell her I'd found another marginally inappropriate calendar to add to our collection (our current selection for 2008 contains half-naked Mormon missionaries...we are liberal arts hippies, however, which seems to be as good an excuse as any for our terrible judgment).

An Aragorn in Underpants calendar, however, would make me quite happy.

Posted by: Barratt at January 1, 2008 4:25 PM

AH my comments requiring an e-mail addy---that is a moveable type thing to cut down on penis ads HERE. You do not have to post your ACTUAL one. I just posted this, for example, using the address, SMITH at Wesson dot com.

Perhaps Scott can change it to somethign that STILL protects us from penis spam comments, but for now, to protect your addy, just, you know, LIE.

Posted by: Joshilyn at January 2, 2008 10:20 PM

LOL. LMAO. "Kitten in Middle School" - that is just too perfect a description for that phase!

Good God, Girl, you are fun-ny!

Posted by: City Girl at January 4, 2008 1:19 PM