June 15, 2007

Cafe Yummitude

SO we went to the GRAIN HOUSE of Vegan Love -- yes Virginia, it WAS Cafe Gratitude. I was worried because all the shoes I have with me are leather.

Me: WIll they kick me out when they see I have on leather shoes?
Jill: How will they know? Maybe they will assume it is a man-made leather subsitute?
Me: They LOOK leather...
Jill: Well, if anyone gives you any flack, tell them it is RECYCLED leather. Say, "It used to be on a cow....but I recycled it!"

At which point I laughed so hard my spleen came out my nose.

I would love to mock cafe Gratitude, and REALLY it would be SO SO SO EASY, because to order HUMMUS you say "I am Happy" and to order Ceasar salad you say "I am Dazzling." You have to say it like you mean it. When the waitress brings your lunch she sets down the salad, say, and she looks you in your eyeballs and she says "YOU ARE DAZZLING."

Dude, she MEANS it.

And then later the Waitress asks you the question of the day which in our case was "Can you please share with me one thing you really celebrate about yourself?"

Cornelia and Jill and i all agreed that it would not be hard to mock them. But oh best beloveds....we could not mock them. Two reasons.

1) THE FOOD. OMG, there is a REASON they name the hummus I AM HAPPY. I ate it YESTERDAY. I am STILL happy. If I could make vegan food taste like this all the time I would totally be vegan.I thought about buying their cookbook, but a quick perusal of the ingredient list in the hummus alone cowed me. I can't get these things at the Whole Foods in ATLANTA much less at my hometown Kroger.

2) The SINCERITY. I am helpless to mock in the face of such true earnest goodwill. True Believers win me over every dern time. Our waitress was adorable. ADORABLE. And SO sincere in her hopes that our meals would help be all abundant and fulfillign and whatnot. She was a peach. Everyone who worked there was peachlike and not DRIPPY. No one drifted about with their toe-bells jingling. They were PEPPY and ENERGETIC and CHEERFUL and DEAR.

All in all, if I lived close, I woudl eat there every freakin Friday. And I cannot mock it. BUT...
I can mock the mirror in the bathroom with its VERY AFFIRMING post potty message.


Actually, even THAT is too easy. BYOM, please.

Posted by joshilyn at June 15, 2007 11:41 AM

One of these days, I'm going to peel the kids off me and make my way across the bridge to Cafe Gratitude. It sounds pretty awesome.

Posted by: Jenn at June 15, 2007 11:52 AM

That's actually a really cool picture of you, too! Not being sarcastic. There's just something really appealing about the pic.

And the food sounds to die for!

Posted by: Beth at June 15, 2007 6:28 PM

Well, you ARE Dazzling. Glad even the people out there can recognize that.
Hope your 'research' trip is a blast.
Man, you're out in SanFran, Laura went to France... some things are just too cool for words.
Wanna trade places? I'm stuck at home with cranky kids. No, really, you'll have a blast. Really!

Posted by: dee at June 15, 2007 7:13 PM

Ok, I so have to pee now.

Posted by: Angie Poole at June 15, 2007 8:58 PM

Someday I hope to grow up and have great tasty adventures like Joss. I hope that day comes soon because I'm at least a decade order than her, I'm not sure I can walk a New York block in stocking feet, let alone 10 in search of pizza. But darn I'd like to try.

Posted by: Cele at June 16, 2007 12:25 AM

I have to go eat some hummus now. Thanks ;)

So what's in the hummus? I think my recipe is better than store-bought stuff, but I can't think of any exotic ingredients I can't get at Publix.

Posted by: Angel at June 16, 2007 1:18 AM

Re: the hummus

Traditionally hummus is chick pea based, but there is flexibility there. There's a nifty restaurant in Atlanta called Wysteria that serves hummus made from black eyed peas. It comes with sweet potato chips for scooping. Delicious!

I also agree that the camera phone pic is fabulous on many levels.

Posted by: Mr. Husband at June 16, 2007 6:46 AM

Might I add that you seem to have a very come hither look on your face in that picture. Like, I am fulfilled, but I would be more fulfilled if ... well, this is a G-rated blog.

Posted by: Heather Cook at June 16, 2007 4:56 PM

Yeah, Heather. I agree. I think that's why Mr. Husband likes it so much. ;)

Posted by: Leandra at June 17, 2007 4:23 PM

Now being that you are a well read blogger, and thus somewhat famous... do we need a release form from that person behind you in the Cafe Gratitude "Glad-I-Pooed" image?

Just sayin... protect yer assets girl!!

Posted by: Joy Beagle at June 18, 2007 5:31 AM

That person behind me is a painting, not an alive human!

Posted by: joshilyn at June 18, 2007 8:45 AM

I usually feel very fulfilled after a good potty break. Don't you?

Posted by: Heather at June 18, 2007 1:41 PM

Bring Your Own Meat? or is that some other catchy blogbreviation that has totally passed me by?

Posted by: dramamama at June 18, 2007 9:39 PM

Bring. Your. Own. Mock.

Posted by: joshilyn at June 18, 2007 9:57 PM