June 1, 2006

A Winner is ME

I belong to a Yahoo! group of mostly women, mostly mother writers --- I have been on this list for YEARS, actually. I love to hear the BING of an e-mail arrive when I am drafting because I can STOP for a moment go read it, so I belong to quite a few lists. (You can find the ones I think are good on my links ---not blinks, links---page.)

Anyway, this ONE I am on has AWARDS every year in various catagories, and everyone votes secretly and you can campaign for yourself and/or others and it's a huge HUGE list, bobbing up and down between one and two thousand members. We finished up the voting at the end of this month, and I was surprised to find I had won a couple. I took home “Most Likely to Become Famous” (and stop speaking to the rest of the list) Award and also "Most Outrageous" which is a sort of medicated second cousin to "The Funniest." I think it means "Funny, but Probably Mentally Ill." Thank you. I accept.

I was very very surprised to see that I had been nominated, much less won. WELL, that's not ENTIRELY true. I KNEW I would be nommed because I SHAMELESSLY nominated MY OWN SELF for Early Bird since I get up at 5 to write. Some chick that gets up at 4 beat me out. (Gratz Teena) But it was surprising that nominations not made BY ME FOR ME showed up --- I've been so quiet on that list lately. I was sure they had forgotten I exist. Lord knows I practically have forgotten. My slavering deadline, fanged and wearing tight pants, is stalking me. I am struggling to carve out enough writing time to get the book that is SO PERFECT here in my head out onto paper still recognizable as the lovely creature I IMAGINE it being. Story, moving from the head to the page, is the longest trip I know.

When they post the winners, they ALSO post ALL the nominees, which was cool because several of the people I nommed did not win, and yet they still got listed and recognized as cool, so. BUT! Perusing the nominations, I made the sad discovery that someone on that list SMOKES CRACK, positive BOATLOADS of crack, because I saw one person (and I can only assume it was ONE person) nommed me for "Most organized" After I stop laughing, I am going to have to schedule an intervention for that special lady. And here I pause to turn full face to the camera and say, "Whoever you are, if you are reading this blog entry, please step forward and let us help you. Crack kills, baby."

I am, in fact SO disorganized that I MISSED the annual CHAT where they announce the awards and stuff. I missed it because I forgot what day it was. I do not mean I forgot what day the CHAT was SCHEDULED --- I have been on that list for years, it's the same date every year. I mean, I forgot what the actual date was. I couldn't have told you if yesterday was Tuesday or Thursday (sources close to me have now informed me it was actually NEITHER), and I didn't realize we were even CLOSE to May's death and June's ascension.

I am SO disorganized that the SIGNED FIRST EDITION of Warren St. John's RAMMER JAMMER YELLOW HAMMER that I got for my dad for his upcoming birthday has been sitting in the middle of my office floor SINCE I got it at a lit conference that took place in the VERY beginning of May. It was sitting on the floor with about 15 other books in a veritable SNOWDRIFT of literature, and so for weeks now I have looked at that book on top of the snowdrift and thought, "If I don't get that thing off the floor, one day I will forget to put an appeasing sprinkle of food in the dieting-and-bitter-about-it cat's dish the minute I come down the stairs, and instead I will pour coffee and go to my office, and the cat will come roaring in after me, displeased, and ANNOUNCE I forgot the morning's kibble sprinkle in his usual manner, which is to say, he will take his mighty hooked claws and rend something on my office floor in twain, and since I don't have my favorite bone colored high heeled suede wedgie ankle strap sandals down here just now, he will choose a book, and even though there are at LEAST fifteen books there on the floor, only one of them is a signed first edition for my dad, and THAT will be the one. And then what will I do for my dad's birthday???"

I think I have had this chain of thought a solid TEN times over the last month...AND YET! I kept getting distracted by something SHINY in mid-bend-to-pick-up, and sure enough, this morning, I charged down the stairs with an epiphany I had just had about how to open Chapter 18, and I went directly to my office without passing Bowl or sprinkling 200 Kibbles, and as I was drafting, the cat came through like the wrath of the starving and long abandoned Aztec gods and SHREDDED the front cover of the one book in that book pile I REALLY wanted to preserve. GAHHHHHHHHHH!

AND MAY I SAY, Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer was sitting RIGHT BY the copy of How Opal Mehta Got Kissed, Got Wild, and Got A Life I had ordered (USED) from Powell's on the same day I ordered Sloppy Firsts. (New copy, natch) Yeah, I wanted to read them side by side. PS Sloppy Firsts is a VERY sharp, smart, book--- strong voice and layered characters. Nails adolescence. Sticks the landing. ANYWAY, why couldn't the cat destroy the Opal Mehta book which was bought used and which, quite frankly, I am not ever going to give as a present?

Other things on the TOP of that 15 book drift in the middle of my office that went COMPLETELY unmolested:
Some falling apart galleys in bound MS page form
A National Geographic that Scott already devoured
A copy of gods in Alabama, which, as you can imagine, is not my ONLY copy of that particular work....

But no. Had to be the Rammer Jammer, did it?
Cat: *smug voice* Yes.

I HOPE I am organized enough to remember to go RESHOP for my dad before his birthday. Which is IFFY. Because last year, his birthday was in August, and that means it will probably be in August again THIS year, and what are the chances I can get organized enough to go shop and find and wrap before THAT deadline? Because I think it may be June today.

GAH I have now spent the tiny slice of life I had carved out to BLOG this morning babbling ON AND ON AND ON....GAH, I need to go jump back on Chapter 18, jump on it hard, jump RIGHT on it as if it were Johnny Depp in Full. Pirate. Regalia. ... Wait, what was I talkign about?

LOVE,
The Outrageous and soon to be Famous Ms Joshilyn "Oh no, now she got the Big Head" Jackson

Posted by joshilyn at June 1, 2006 9:06 AM
Comments

Not a big head, a TRIANGLE head:) Either way, you deserve it all!

Posted by: Chris at June 1, 2006 9:19 AM

Did you also get an award for best shoes??

Also, what day WAS yesterday? What day is today?

Posted by: DebR at June 1, 2006 9:35 AM

We, William and I, saw Johnny Depp yesterday. He was on the same plane as us, Heathrow to JFK. Well, okay, it wasn't actually Johnny Depp. It just looked like him. Okay, so not Johhny so much. It looked like his character, Jack Sparrow. VERY MUCH LIKE JACK SPARROW. William pointed out that he was a) shorter and b) skinnier and c) younger and he couldn't really be Johhny or Jack. We were, I should point out, having this conversation in the middle of a big line of people trying to get through customs. All these people were listening to us. I countered that it didn't really matter, that despite not really being Johnny or Jack (because alas, Jack is not a character and not a real person), he was still cute and I would definitely "do him". To this comment at least a dozen people standing nearby nodded and 'uh-huh'ed in the affirmative, including several men.

Posted by: Laume at June 1, 2006 10:05 AM

Oh, mi gosh. this would happen to me. I am Queen Procrastinor in my neck of the woods. I am so good at it that I am suffering turn around, learning that if I want it done (or if you want it done) it must be done now....OR.NEVER! My boss says I am the most efficient procrastinor he's ever seen...shhh, it's because he doesn't open my file draw.

So imagine my brother's surprise come next Tuesday when he gets his UPS'd box with his timely birthday present (which he may or may not like, but I was on a mission to make deadline.) My sister is now crowing that she is Queen PROCRASTINATOR of our neck of the woods, because she's still not shipped his Christmas presents. Dagnabit!

And I know you won't forget us when you become famous...well, unless you pile us amid your literary snowdrift and the big mean cat comes along on a mission.

Posted by: Cele at June 1, 2006 12:07 PM

Obviously that damned cat is an Auburn Tiger. Kill it at once.

Posted by: Angela at June 1, 2006 12:37 PM

Sweetheart, you are already famous.

Smooches!

Posted by: Mir at June 1, 2006 1:37 PM

Too bad about the Opal Mehta book. Try smearing a bit of tuna across the cover.

Posted by: Edgy Mama at June 1, 2006 4:09 PM

Yeah.. you are already famous! Even if you are on the OTHER list... which I do miss quite a bit. LOL

Posted by: Heather Cook at June 1, 2006 4:22 PM

Chris and Mir both beat me to it. Congrats on the Big Head! ;)

Posted by: Amy-GO at June 1, 2006 5:59 PM

Oh Joshilyn- you're many times a winner! Today Booksense announced the July list.
The July 2006 Book Sense Picks

1. BETWEEN, GEORGIA: A Novel, by Joshilyn Jackson (Warner, $22.99, 0446524425) "Following on the heels of Gods in Alabama, Joshilyn Jackson's new novel will be welcomed by readers and fans. A small (population 90) town with two feuding families is drawn together by the infant Nonny -- born of the Crabtrees, raised by the Freets." --Mary Gay Shipley, That Bookstore In Blytheville, Blytheville, AR

number one.

And you have a strong contendter for the SIBA award for gods in AL (that's the regional Southern Independant Bookstore's Association- all the bookstore in that region!)

my only gripe is - it wasn't Fran's quote!

Posted by: Tammy at June 1, 2006 10:57 PM

I'd love to find a good online writers group to be part of. If anyone has a link, suggestion, or referral please pass it my way. BTW...I do nonfiction, so if it matters...

I know some groups only consider fiction writers to be real writers, and I'd rather find one that would include me openly.

thanks in advance,
Tina

Posted by: tina at June 2, 2006 1:01 PM