December 9, 2005

Frolics with Sigmund

The number, she is a-rising again...I had a hideous dream about BETWEEN, GEORGIA last night, not least among the horrid events in this dream: Warner changed my beautiful Anne Twomey cover to this three dimensional thing with half a Barbie coming out of the front, on a SPRING, so she BOBBLED around. And she had blackened eyes, like Beaten-Up Barbie, and snarly ratted hair and streaks of filth on her cheeks and was wearing nothing but one long spangly earring and a tube top.

I saw the cover when I went into a bookshop that is actually in Seattle and that I have never been to, but in the dream it was in California. And Fran, a bookseller I know was there. I realized I was only wearing one shoe and had my hair done like a Cupie Doll's with two shaved bald patches on either side and one long CURL on the forehead....LIKE THIS:


I felt, truly, that I MIGHT NOT look my best. So I just POPPED IN to say a quick HI to Fran and she said, "Oh no you have to meet these three women, they HATE your book. They are camped out in front of where we shelved it, and they scream like banshees and pelt anyone who tries to buy the book with their shoes and oh -- maybe if you came and met them they might be nicer? Be nice, okay?"

SO I sit down with them and one looks at my hair and says, YOU LOOK EXACTLY LIKE I THOUGHT YOU WOULD SNICKER SNICKER.
Me: "HI, why do you hate my book so?
One of 'em: Dunno. Just do.
Me: Well -- is it not what you expected?
Another of 'em: We expected it not to SUCK, so. You could say that.
Me: Oh, um, is it just that it is different from my first book? Like, you liked gods in Alabama and you---
Third one: Oh no. We hated THAT book too.

I think I don't need Freud to figure out what this means...Anxious much? Why, yes. Because in my secret pink heart I love this book and am almost nauseatingly proud of it. So trhis has to be anxiety. And if Freud was here, I think he would take careful note of the fact that there are THREE women. That means something, probably something mythological, like furies or fates or a penis.

Freud would also know WHY I had the dream: We are at the point with BETWEEN where we are looking for BLURBS. Warner and I are asking a buncha folks I admire and who do not know me from Adam's housecat to please read my book, and what if they HATE AND REVILE ME, and you just want your heroes to like you back, you know? So. I am going to sit here and think good thoughts about NOT THROWING UP.

You, meanwhile, need to concentrate on getting your B4B entries up. THE DEADLINE APPROACHETH! Or, if, say, Barbara Kingsolver happens to be your sister, you could busy yourself asking her to consider reading my book. Hey, whatever keeps you out of bars.

Posted by joshilyn at December 9, 2005 10:24 AM

Um, let's see...
I don't know you, in fact, I found your site because of UO deco, but I've been reading your blog everyday since then. I bought "Gods in Alabama" and loved it. And basically, I want your next book, and the one after that, and and the one after that, etc. Oh, and you're very pretty and have GREAT taste in shoes.

Is that a good blurb? I know I'm not a writer or anything, but hey... you know...

Posted by: J at December 9, 2005 11:06 AM

Joss I have no idea what it is you snack on - except it isn't Zanax or Zoloff - before you go to bed, but honey try cocoa or a really big Long Island Ice tea instead.

Go back and note that you just can't win all the people in the world over (just most of us.) And in Seattle it is wet and windy at this time of year, if people aren't wearing stocking caps - toks - or whatever on their heads, then they are suffering from a 6 month long really bad hair day that last from mid October to mid April - you'll fit right in with that cupie doll image. But you'll be wearing cuter shoes.

We are all here lusting for the release of General....which is projected for when?

Posted by: Cele at December 9, 2005 11:07 AM

"We expected it not to suck. So." Yeah, that'd be kinda a sucky blurb.

BUT SEE, this is just your subconscious getting all the ickies out, and soon you will have all of your excellent blurbs to comfort you. They'll all say "Even better than gods! Plus, the author is so thin and pretty!" and you'll feel better.

Posted by: Mir at December 9, 2005 11:18 AM

Listen, as good as Between is, if you really start wearing your hair like a Kewpie doll you are going to start a FAD, I tell you. A trend for people who want to look like they write bestsellers! Here's your blurb:
"This book is so good you'll shave your head to look like the author and be UNBEARABLY pleased with the results."
Now who wouldn't want to read THAT? ;)

Posted by: Amy-GO at December 9, 2005 12:17 PM

How many words so far, O Goddess of Procrastination and Yucky Blurb Dreams?

Posted by: Karen Abbott at December 9, 2005 12:40 PM

Oh, sweetie... there will be no suckiness, there will only be luminous pranceful conjoinings.

And your cover Barbie sounds like the Harley-Davidson Barbie I bought my goddaughter for her second birthday...

Posted by: Cornelia Read at December 9, 2005 1:19 PM

Honey ((((HUGS)))) I hate bad dreams but your dream sounds like fear since your book is coming out and you are anxious for it to come and thinking of all those horrible things that could possibly happen. Don't worry about what a few might think, think about what MOST will know. Oh, I haven't actually met you would that count? hehe

Posted by: Eliza at December 9, 2005 2:40 PM

"As refreshing as sipping Sweet Tea on a Savannah front porch"
My blurb to you. I wouldn't be known to anyone at all, but I am on my third book so :P

Still I must say, even if they hated the book in your dream, remember it invoked a passionate response. Love and Hate are both passions, its when you fail to invoke any emotion at all that you fail as a writer ... *waxing philosophical at a drive in near you*


Posted by: Tina at December 9, 2005 4:28 PM

Fran here, and I would never allow people to camp out your book and throw shoes! Peach, you know I'd thump them soundly until they came to their senses! But that's not going to be an issue, because everyone's going to love Between, just like they love gods.


Posted by: Fran at December 9, 2005 4:31 PM

your book fucking rocks... and dont forget it... xx

Posted by: Bookseller to the Stars at December 9, 2005 5:44 PM

Oh, Joss, thank you! When I saw the picture, Cupie memories came flooding back to me. It's true, I actually had a freaky little Cupie as a young 'un. She brought out my canine side, apparently, as I chewed her more often than cuddling her. I don't even want to know what Freud might have to say about a child that gnaws on a naked balding baby! Thanks for the memories!

Posted by: Carolyn Hueston at December 10, 2005 12:44 PM

Hey Joss, I think you got the wrong dream. Someone sent me one that was supposed to be yours...

Posted by: Martha O'Connor at December 12, 2005 1:17 PM

Girl you are SO not goin to suck. And forgive my presumptuousness of saying girl :)

What's a Cupie doll?

Posted by: Kai at December 14, 2005 12:12 PM