August 27, 2005

Saturday Morning Pajama-Speak

Me: My love for you is like a snowflake.

Him: Melting? Damp and chilled?

Me: No, more like, you know, unique and um, but not cold. Bah, maybe not. Maybe my love for you is like Maisy's faviorite bear?

Him: Pink and abandoned on the floor?

Me: Well, pink anyway.

Him: That's nice.

Me: *makes encouraging eyebrows*

Him: ...

Me: *makes bigger encouraging eyebrows*

Him: Yes?

Me: And your love for me is like...

Him: Oh. Hrm. A newt.

Me: A big newt?

Him: Yes. A big newt that has crawled up to the top of the tank and is clinging to the screen. ***DIGRESSION: The biggest newt, Fig, DOES THIS NOW. His gills dropped off and now he goes up on the island and breathes AIR and tries to get out the top and clings to the screen with his creepy little newty feet. UGH!***

Me: Clinging desperately?

Him: Yes. Desperately.

Me: That's nice. My love for you is like the pancakes I made this morning out of that mix I got at the wackjob organic food consortium.

Him: Oaty?

Me: Nutrative! And soaked in sweetness!

Him: That's nice.

Me: *makes in encouraging eyebrows*

Him: ....

Me: And your love for me is like?

Him: Still a newt.

Me: A constant newt?

Him: Indeed.

Me: A newt that is tired of similes?

Him: That's the one.

Me: *leaps off his lap* Then let's go clean out the garage!

Him: Wait!


Him: Wait! Wait but, my love for you is like---

Me: Where are the boxes? Where are the black bags? We must keep a list for taxes because this will all go to the Salvation Army! Get dressed! Rally the children! I'll find a legal pad for the list! Put that Hot Ladies of the 80's perky motivational bebop CD in!

Him: *grumble* Should have stuck with the similes...

Posted by joshilyn at August 27, 2005 8:51 AM

I'm totally stealing that for my next relationship. "My love for you is like a constant newt." I heart Mr. Husband.

Posted by: Mir at August 27, 2005 9:01 AM

Ooooh, a clean garage. Now THAT's love. Oh, Kevin? Honey? Where are you? I have a game to play....

Posted by: Amy at August 27, 2005 9:59 AM

hey at least he was a constant newt...ewh that's just damp.

Posted by: Cele at August 27, 2005 10:43 AM

That sounds like MY house, if you substitute googly eyes for encouraging eyebrows!

May you fill many black bags!


Posted by: "Anne" at August 27, 2005 10:49 AM


Posted by: Heather at August 27, 2005 2:12 PM

Oh, my word! *LOL* Did y'all really say all that? Too funny! The battle of the sexes lives on. Here's to newt vs. nutritive...oh, and clean garages. *snicker*

Posted by: David at August 27, 2005 3:23 PM