Last night we let Bagel out for his final nightly ablution, and he tore down into the yard after a charming, brown-eared An A Bunnies who had slipped under the fence to browse on my always-greener-on-the-other-side-where-the-60-pound-dog-is grass. Which, Oh best Beloveds, you know how that has worked out for An A Bunnies in the past.
This stupid rabbit—bless him!—-he could NOT find the sliver of exit under the back gate and escape. The chase went on for a good two minutes. I ran out onto the deck and screamed at Bagel to STOP CHASING THAT AN A BUNNIES. (Later, I spent some time demanding that water not be wet and that teenage girls stop wearing tight sweatpants that say JUICY across their buttocks, with nearly as much success.)
The chase went on SO LONG, in panicked, loopy bunny circles, that Scott had time to get a flashlight and tracked the An A Bunnies and the dog as they tore back and forth and around the azaleas. We both ran down into the yard and followed in a fruitless but good intentioned dog-thwarting chain. We could not catch the dog, buteventually, Oh Best of all possible Beloveds, the An A Bunnies got tired. He gave up. He stopped.
And Bagel got him.
I saw the long brown body hanging in my beloved dog’s maw, the legs stretched out, the head hanging and still. Scott ran up and grabbed Bagel’s collar but that An A Bunnies was floppy and still; now, I know dogs are dogs, and dogs do what dogs do, but it was pretty awful.
Scott got the dog’s collar and said, “DROP it” And Bagel stood there determinedly NOT dropping it.
“PUT THAT DOWN,” Scott said, and Bagel blinked up at him.
The An A Bunnies blinked up at him too.We looked close. Bagel had a good firm grip on him, for sure, but the An A Bunnies was un pierced, unbroken, unrended. Four animal eyes blinked in tandem, neither exactly sure what was happening or what we wanted. Scott pushed Bagel’s head down and pressed his jaw hinge, and the Bunnies plopped onto the earth and sat there, dazed.
Scott ran the flashlight along him—he was….moist. But only with Dog suck. No blood, no tearing, no little bunny spines had snapped. Bagel had held him as if he were a newspaper or some slippers we needed brought to us whole.
Then the bunnies shook himself and hopped very quickly off, and I dragged Bagel, who wanted to CHASE again, up the stairs and inside.
I closed the door, and Scott went up on the deck and used his light to find the An A Bunnies browsing back in the greenest grass. When the light hit him, he bounded off, all his legs working JUST fine, thanks much.
I went inside and fed Bagel a half a pound of imported prosciutto.
He had NO idea why, but he thought it was a pretty good idea, so he went with it.