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Things to Look At, Click, and Do

This is the Benecio del Toro of turtles. He will kill ALL of you.

1) A Mysterious Fan named “frank” sent me a video message via Monkey Courier. DEAR Lord. SO WEIRD. The urinal background leads me to believe that EITHER this mysterious fan is my favorite author (Frank Turner Hollon), or I need to invest in more guns and guard dogs.

2) The pictured beast was in the middle of the road in my neighborhood. We have many times stopped to rescue box turtles ranging in size from pencil sharpeners to soccer balls, but this guy was something else. I did not take any photos until he was mad and retracted and on the grass, ALAS, but before he tucked in he was a huge globulous mass of ridgetailed lardy cruelty melting out from his low-slung shell. NOT a Box Turtle. He was a snapper, and he weighed a good twenty, maybe twenty-five, pounds. He had a hooked beak like a parrot and a murderous disposition. Still, I could not stand to leave him in the center of the road to get mooshed. The kids and I used a glass and metal picture frame to shove at him with his lightening fast snake-head shooting out and whipping around trying to snap our thumbs off, the ungrateful turd. We finally did herd him into a book crate and carried him down the hill and dumped him by the creek.

3) I forgot to do the Tuesday redirect! I had a HUGE pity party over on Five Full Plates, and did not invite you. Don’t worry, it’s not like there were cupcakes. Just whine and cheeziness, and unlike cupcakes, both whine and cheese will KEEP a couple days. It is the LAST week of the I DARE YOU challenge, and I failed harder with this one that on any of the other challenges I have failed thus far. In point of fact, I have yet to NOT fail a challenge…Mir won 10-n-10 and probably the org challenge as well, and Lydia is winning the comfort zone challenge by forming her own band, The Virginia Janes. Hands down, the winner. I walk around all day singing the song ROBOT and now my kids have picked it up.

THANK YOU ALL YOU BUTTON PUSHERS who are participating in the Virtual Book Tour. The count down continues…Only 48 days left for you hold outs to get in on the Hot button pushing Alabama Booksmith Action, get a signed and/or personalized copy of my latest (or any of my other books, for that matter). It makes a super gift, and you will be supporting both a fantastic Indie Bound store and, you know, me. *scrubs toe in dirt*

If, before you commit, you want to know more about BACKSEAT SAINTS (or my stupid dog, or my secret crush on that breath-stealing jerkface, Joe Camel), All Things Girl picked me as their May Cover Girl (!!!!!) Can I put “cover girl” on my resume, now, do you think? I think yes. I’ve been written up by this super-smart woman named Roxanne Ravenel, and part one is up. These are not your Gramma’s questions…Ms. Ravenel gives good interview!

19 comments to Things to Look At, Click, and Do

  • Well. . .first of all let me say that she did a GREAT job on the article. . .as did you with your answering of questions. AND, AND, AND I just soaked up those lines from Backseat Saints like a sponge. AND even MORE is the fact that MY VERY SELF-SAME name is Roxanne. No lie. Don’t even have a middle one. . .just my maiden name stuck in there once I got married. My mother was a rebel and named me that in the summer of ’69. . .my sister is Suzanne. Leave it to a southern woman to do such a thing.

    Soooooooooooooooo. . .since THAT Roxanne hadn’t even READ your other books or even THOUGHT of being a Best Beloved, and THIS Roxanne typing a shameless loaded comment has not only read ALL of your books but recommended them to several people AND given them as gifts, can I get an ARC too? I just about came out of my skin when she said she “picked up a copy of Backseat Saints.” Seriously. . .

    No? Well. It was worth a try. 🙂 And the article really WAS great. Can’t wait for the book to FINALLY get here!!!!! And you are the prettiest. (had to try one more time. . .)

  • Well aren’t you all gorgeous with your eyes! I shall go read now…

  • AM I? I question your judgement but accept the idea that I lean farther toward gorgeous WITH them than I would be if I was more…Schubert-y. Or Johnny Depp in Once Upon A Tme In Mexico-ey.

  • Oooh Joss! The interview makes me super extra excited to read the new book! I’m thinking I might want to re-read gods first, too.

  • JulieB

    This was an excellent interview. I’m happy there is a second part.

  • Brigitte

    I’m lovin’ the Monkey Mail! Though I do sometimes ponder the fact that all English-speaking chimpanzees seem to have British accents.

  • Brigitte

    Ooh, and I’m still the same monster as last time, I guess it “sticks.” It looks rather like my perpetually angry, shriveled heart.

  • Great interview. The excerpts make me impatient for the the book, especially Mirabelle’s rant. I was right along with her – the cutting, the starving, the hitting, all the while in my head nodding and thinking “why do people do this to themselves?” And then the eating. Oh. I understand that. It’s the same. So I’m sitting here with my cat grunt-purring on my lap, tears on my face, thinking that I need to find the courage to change. Killing ourselves, huh? I love it when authors write Truth, even while it hurts me.

  • Sandi — It’s the exact experience I had, researching this book. I didn’t want to pity Rose, you know? Who wants to write about a pitiable little beaten down rag? I wanted her to be a WHOLE person I was interested in, sharp and funny and smart and flawed… In other words, I wanted to empathize with her. It shocked to me to realize how much common ground I shared with her and learning empathy, because Lord knows I am HAPPY to kill myself with butter. I would PURELY love to kill myself with Camel Special Lights, too, truth be told, although I have that one under control. For now. But I knwo there but for the grace of God go I, you know?

  • JenniferG

    I have become so well-trained that I went to FFP on Tuesday when there was no new post on FTK.

    Great interview, looking forward to the next installment and even more to the book! I agree with Heather, you look super-fabulous in the pictures. You have to trust us on this.

  • Aimee

    Oh, she DOES give great interview — and so do you! Your picture is quite beautiful too — and don’t think I didn’t notice that the blurb before you click through to the interview said so TOO.

    I loved what you said about empathy, both in the interview and in your response to Sandi, above. That’s hugely important, as a writer. My husband and I just finished a screenplay about a guy who cheated on his wife and then sort of stood by while she was killed — he didn’t kill her, but he didn’t sacrifice himself to save her either. Finding empathy for him was a challenge, but in the end you have to do it for the story to work. I cannot WAIT to read Backseat Saints. 🙂

  • OMG!! You have the most BEAUTIFUL eyes. How do you not have every man in Georgia just drowning in those? Do you walk around with sunglasses on all the time? Mercy!!!

    Great interview. I can not wait to get my copy of Backseat Saints. I just love your books.

  • Bernice G

    Congrats on the “beautiful AND talented.”

  • Janie

    The interview was great! I’ll tell you the best part for me is your authenticity. Seriously, here you are: an honest-to-goodness, real life, I can’t believe I actually met a REAL writer, author and your answers to the questions seemed to be a backyard cookout with margaritas kind of friend to friend answers. I’m sure you are as used to interviews as possible after 3 books but you don’t make up answers that sound “right”. You speak honestly and that makes you even more endearing to us! Congrats on your cover girl moment!

  • Wait, how are you not winning the dare challenge when you (and your kids) wrangle a snapping turtle? I’ve done that once in my life, and I was armed with a broom handle and a overturned trash can.

  • Linda J

    Wow what a read. That paragraph made me crave more already! Love Love the photo and I did buy the Family Circle with you in it. I was flipping through when it was Sam that caught my eye and then I found the page. Bought it on the spot. Inspiration for me to walk 2 1/2 miles yesterday. Go me. And come on June already…

    Love your work and your backside looks so tiny in those jeans

  • I wanted to apologize for mispronouncing your name all of this time. Being the southern transplant that I am ( I came for the fiction and folklore) I just assumed that it was the feminine version of Josh. You know, that you were named after your daddy. I am feeling pressure to comment on your eyes after reading the previous comments. If I don’t comment on them, will it seem that I am purposefully not saying anything about them because I don’t want you to become conceited? Or that I am petty and jealous and commenting on your eyes would be admitting that mine are not poetry worthy, let alone comment worthy. And if I do say something about them, now, after the other comments, will I simply seem like I am a kiss-up, wannabee groupy? Hmmm…what’s a fan to do? Looking forward to the book and loved the interview.

  • Nic

    Jos, I am so conflicted! As a long time reader I of course am waiting impatiently for the release of Backseat Saints and while I’d love an autographed copy, I noticed that the official release date is sooner than those you sign will be released. Whats a girl to do? I want my copy A.S.A.P., but if it helps you (and impresses your publisher) I can wait for the 16th. Please understand that I’ll be purchasing on the 8th unless you say that its better for you to get those offered on the 16th. Any advice?

  • Les in AZ

    My sister here in AZ just adopted a desert tortoise – its awesome. But those snappers – just unpleasant as can be.

    I ordered my book this weekend 🙂 I can’t wait to get it! The interview was awesome too!

    Look at you go – just amazing all they way around. Lucky dog!