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Mean Memes

Kimberly from FTK posted this quote from SONEONE ELSE'S LOVE STORY on July 3, 2014 at 2:22 pm. She is winner 1 in the William Morrow quotes contest. Winners 2 and 3 will be announced in the next two posts!

Kimberly from FTK posted this quote on July 3, 2014 at 2:22 pm. She is winner 1 in the William Morrow quotes contest. Winners 2 and 3 announced in the next two posts!

Mono has grounded me. When I am not working, instead of going about with kids or friends or to yoga or to walk the dogs or to the YMCA or out to eat, I stare morosely into the depths of the internet, entertaining myself as I rest. FACEBOOK is my new leisure activity. The other day, someone posted one of those word puzzles that says, “THE FIRST THREE WORDS YOU SEE DESCRIBE YOU,” you know those? SO I peered into its wordy depths and almost immediately I saw:


I think that stupid puzzle called me wishy-washy! All my words have a Y n the end— so I am nothing definitive. I am not ENERGETIC. I am Energetic-Y. Which is like being energentic-ISH.

Not a LOVER but LOVER-Y. As in, Having some faded loverish qualities, but not worth taking home to mother.

Hearty, I object to on the principle that makes me sound like a giant hairy pirate. I have decided that it must be read in line with the others, as Heart-Y, in which case it means I am a person with a certain amount of heart. But not, you know, tons.

Perhaps it means only that I am wildly attracted to the letter Y. Yes. I have definitely learned that I am a person who tends to see words that end in Y first. Even when the words cannot legally end in Y AND be grammatically correct.

WAIT— if Y IS my favorite letter, then personality-wise, maybe that tells you the same thing? Y is the most wishy-washy of all letters. It is the only letter that is SOMETIMES a vowel. It is vowelish. Consonant-y, if you will.

If you are sick, you can always count on Facebook to entertain you by telling you what ____ you are, but now I have taken 90 in a row. I bet if I checked back with the word search now, the first thing I would see would be Narcissist-y. THANKS, Facebook, for offering me YET ANOTHER WAY to be sucked down to stare deep, deep, deep into the scintillating depths of my angst-ridden navel

Do you do this? Have you been click-enticed to find out what muppet or color or breed of dog or character from Buffy or element you are? If so, is anyone SPIKE? I even saw one that will tell you if you have what it takes to WIN THE HUNGER GAMES. If you take that one, and you DO have what it takes, you should probably go take a “Am I a murderous sociopath?” quiz, and if that one comes up daisies, get help.

Did you do the word puzzle one? Were any of your three words definitive or TRUE —- or insulting?

ALSO! did you enter this yet? This is a REALLY cool give away from my pub house, for your whole book club or neighborhood or pack of read-y friends. (Read that like HEART-Y. Not HEARTY. Heart-Y. Not READY to GO, like Read-ish. Reader-y. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.) You can win

10 paperback editions of Someone Else’s Love Story (and if schedules allow I will Skype into your book club)
A $100 gift card to your local bookstore
1 copy of each book in that New Voices in Fiction sampler
I curated. That’s 11 debut novels!

Five runner up peeps get 5 copies of SELS.

You can enter HERE.

13 comments to Mean Memes

  • Corey

    Yes! I’m entered and hoping to win!
    I also do the quizzes sometimes, though I don’t always get all of the pop-culture references because of my low status on the household DVR machine. Recently, I heartily objected to how long I would last in the Zombie Apocalypse–pretty sure I’m good for several weeks, not hours.

  • I do the quizzes, but I am a master manipulator (so says the quiz) and can achieve any desired result (unless the quiz includes tons of pop culture stuff for which I have no reference point).

    While I’m here, can I say how much I loved SELS? Although I’ve read all your books to date, my mystery/science fiction/police procedural soul has always held back just a tiny bit from giving itself wholeheartedly to true love. But SELS pulled me all the way in. The language is lush without being overdone, the characters are appealing, the ending is absolutely perfect, all the reveals perfectly timed…now that it’s been a couple of weeks since I finished it, I’ ready to read it again.

    Er, fan-girl gush is also totally out of character for me.

  • Holly Gault

    I don’t do them. It sounds like you shouldn’t, either. Surely the internets offer MANY opportunities for time spenders.

  • Brigitte

    I get sucked into the quizzes all the time, even when it’s about shows I don’t even watch and what-not. My most recent was Which Disciple, I’m apparently Judas!

  • Beth

    This is my favorite one from the new Onion parody site:

    “Are you an Introvert, Extrovert, or a Sea Monster?”


  • I do those quizzes on occasion. I have begun to suspect that they aren’t very scientific in their design. Also, they never have the answer I would give if it were an option so I have to pick something that “sort of” fits.

    I want to be Spike. Spike’s my favorite.

  • Ron Tarbox

    I take umbrage at your statement that Y is the most wishy-washy of all letters. All intelligent people agree that the wishiest and the washiest of letters is Q. The reasoning for this conclusion is unimpeachable. The letter Q can’t decide what it wants to be, so it is dependent upon its friend the letter U. You never see Q without U, but does U reciprocate in the same manner? Oh no!! U, when standing by itself, is *very* happy to be U!!! While some may see this as an indictment on U’s character, I maintain that Q doesn’t have the force of personality to stand alone and will never be seen without U. And although Y might be confused as to whether it is a consonant or a vowel (I maintain that Y was born that way…not that there’s anything wrong with that), it always remains true to its letterness. The same cannot be said of Q. When Q decides to put on its finest and look its most beautiful, i.e. the cursive Q out on the town, it throws off it’s letter heritage and tries to become something it’s not – a number….and not just ANY number, but the number two!! That’s right…NUMBER 2!!! Ain’t that some shi….well, nevermind.

  • Gail

    Ah, the facebook quizzes. A couple of friends and I do them purely for the purpose of making fun of them. Like once I took one called “Which Supreme Court Justice Should You Fantasize About?” and it gave me Scalia and that possibly made me more angry than an internet quiz should. There was this really awesome thing a while back that was “Turn to page 47 of the nearest book. The first sentence will predict your sex life.” It’s actually a really fun game. Although less so (or maybe more so?) when you play it with academics whose closest books are very dry. One of my friends had only a picture of Putin on page 47.

  • Kristin

    When I took the “What Jurassic Park character are you?” I got the obnoxious kid at the beginning who pimps Grant about the velociraptor. So, great.

  • edj

    I take those quizzes although I don’t usually post the results on my FB wall because I think it might be slightly embarrassing. But I’ll put my results in the comments of whoever posted it on my newsfeed. I am Princess Leia. I should live in London and be a writer. My ideal hair colour is red. Also, I don’t mean to brag, but I took the quiz “what kind of wife are you?” and my result was: you are a perfect wife. Yes, she said quietly and humbly. Also? My mental age is Kindergarten. Not so sure what to do with that one.

  • I get so sucked into those quizzes! And I’ve learned that I’m a sexy mom, my perfect weather is in San Francisco (whose isn’t?), but I should live in Chicago? I’m 87% Southern (I’ve lived in Maryland my entire life), if I were a Golden Girl I’d be Dorothy, my Disney Prince is Eric, my husband is 95% awesome, and I’m lawfully socially responsible.

    I entered the contest too! I really hope I win!

  • To: RON TARBOX Also, Q is a wannabe capital O which tracked dirt in on its shoes – while desperately clinging to the U. I rest your case. Heh.

  • HA! Ranger, Ron is a friend of mine from WAY WAY back in grad school days. Like, 20+ years now. And he has ALWAYS had it in for Q.