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Apology Cookie

Remember when I was sick? Not me. Not much. It is kind of a mucus-y, eye-juice coated blurry-lensed blur of blurredness, as if I lived 3 days filmed through cheesecloth. During that time, I flat did not show up for a book event, which is not like me. So I went back Thursday to make up the event and I brought an apology cookie with little birds on it for the Staff and any readers who came back. Here is the cookie — it says SORRY I SUCK. And yeah, I think it is important to take responsibility for ones bigger screw ups and apologize, but the truth is, you should probably supply sugary carbs if you REALLY mean it.


ALSO I got the BEST CHRISTMAS PRESENT maybe EVER from William Morrow, my publishing house. It is SO SO SO COOL. I can’t hardly stand it. It is my book, bound in LEATHER with gold leafletty pages, like what books USED to look like when they were all lovingly crafted by elves or whatever they did before mass production. HOW COOL IS THIS?

I love to get presents. I KNOW THIS IS NOT WHAT CHRISTMAS IS ABOUT OR WHATEVER But I love them. Doesn;t have to be anythign expensive—and I have a SMALL HOUSE so I really like little luxury consumables I won’t buy myself—like luxe lotions or lipsticks or Nail Polish and plush socks or delicious toffee enrobed in dark chocolate. I love to rend paper and SEE WHAT IS IN THERE. I got some awesome presents from YOU guys on tour, including quilted cosies and pink airplane socks and a creativity spell jar and some very KIND handwritten notes and wine and a stress cat, which is a little stuffed cat whose head has been velcroed on with GORY RED VELCRO. You can RIP HIS HEAD OFF and FLING it if you need to.

I kinda need to. Often.

My fellow Christmas celebrators, let me ask you, What are you hoping to find in YOUR stocking? And have you been nice or naughty?

13 comments to Apology Cookie

  • My favoritey favorite thing about Christmas is giving. It, truly, is. My husband and I agreed once kids were part of the equation that we would spend our Christmas monies on them and not on us, too. So we don’t make lists for one another, or whatever, but IF I DID. I would want a Furls Crochet Hook. They are **shiver** gorgeous and amazing (in theory, I don’t actually own one as they are also very expensive for crochet hooks). They are expensive enough that I can’t justify actually spending regular every day monies on them, but oh, as a gift. Yeah.

  • Linda J

    I am in full hope mode for ANYTHING from my old man. We have been back together for 4 years and he has not given me even one gift under the tree. I’m sorry but a $4 item in OCTOBER is NOT a Christmas gift!!! There is not a worse feeling than sitting down to do the gifting and he says I didn’t get you anything, knowing I got him a big expensive jack that he desperately needed. So from then on I seriously have only gotten him his shirts thinking maybe… Last year I got him 5. I still got nothing. This year I got him 2. Maybe???

    2 years ago was the best Christmas EVER!!! I got to give everyone who I buy for what I wanted to give them. Christmas eve I just sat back looking at all the gifts under the tree and I was filled with pure bliss,love, peace, and joy. The next morning was the I got you nothing comment but I knew that at least I didn’t do that to anyone else.

  • Karen in Md

    I have been naughty. I bought myself stuff while shopping for my beloveds. And then my husband caught me. So I’m letting him give me the stuff for Christmas. So I’ve been nice, too.

  • I want a picture of the stress cat!

  • c

    and the book, pleeeeease. it sounds extra lovely

  • Gaylin

    I am expecting nothing. Sad but true. Well, not sad, I like having Christmas on my own. Stay in my pj’s, watch Dr. Who and cook myself a lovely meal.

    Your book description – beautiful!

    I did get luxury chocolates in the mail this week but there is only one left and I think it is near extinction.

    Have a very merry ho ho ho.

  • Brigitte

    I am a fan of consumables, like chocolates from the local choclatier and fancy Turkish pistachios (not those Cali ones, phooey). Though Gaylin’s Christmas plan sounds perfect to me!

    I guess that puts me on the naughty list, wanting more than a couple hours at a stretch to myself . .

  • I so want that stress cat!

    Of course chocolate will do as an acceptable diversion. Both would be better.

    So glad you’re feeling better! The cookie was a nice touch; not all authors are as considerate.

  • Zoe

    I was expecting an engagement ring until I caught my boyfriend cheating on me 2 days ago. And he confessed. So, I bought myself an iPad. 😀

  • Chris

    My favorite gift every single year is the goofy Legos my husband and I exchange. Oh, but I am a kid at heart:)

  • Jill

    I am a 53 year old woman who has always gotten a doll for Christmas- I collect cloth dolls!!!
    Linda J and Gaylin- you two need to get together this Christmas! Linda- you deserve a present from your man!

  • Michelle

    I read this just now but I got what I was hoping for…a copy of Someone Else’s Love Story! Can’t wait to dive in!

  • Donna

    I just finished “Someone else’s love story” — you are amazing!! I told everyone this past year that “Grown up kind of pretty” was the best book I’d read so far, but I’m going to have to change my tune or wait til after Jan. 1 and tell them about your newest book, best book of the year 2014. I’ve read all your books and hope some day I can meet you and tell you in person how much pleasure you’ve given me.