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RECREATIONAL ROBOTS and PS You Are Invited

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LOOK what I will be doing this afternoon. 4 PM EST. You come, too. Pretty please? Sugar etc? It will be fun.

THIS IS WHERE THE CHAT TAKES PLACE (to be clear) (because I got a couple of asky emails)

I am going to put on eyeliner and a nice top. SECRETLY, you and I will both know that from the waist down it is a horrorful wasteland consisting of those floppulant pink fantasy Francy-pants I dug out of a dumpster in Avignon and bare Winter Feet in DESPERATE NEED of Pedicurating.

BUT the parts on camera are going to look moderately mentally well. I will look as much like my author photo as I humanly can without photoshop to smooth the rage horn wrinkles on my forehead into Faux-Botoxian smoothness. THIS I VOW.

Come hang with me? Click the image above to go to the place and learn how to be at the thing (That was fancy technical internet talk!)

I meant to do a CONTEST this week. I meant to do a LOT of things. Heh. Because you know it is tomorrow, right? SOMEONE ELSE’S LOVE STORY comes out tomorrow. But you knwo this has nto been a smooth fall, personally speaking, and no, we are still nto talkign about it. No real new news to report, for good or ill.

HEY LOOK OVER HERE AT THIS HAPPY SHINY THING: I had a fantastic idea for the TACKIEST CONTEST EVER. SO fun and downright filthy. Here is the idea: You know that NEW FOX SHOW Almost Human about Hot Robot Cop? I was going to have you in the comments explain how the show would approach, broach, cover and establish that Hot Robot Cop has a full set of working robot man bits. Whoever came closest to the actual explanation would win a copy of SIGNED SELS and an adorable baby paper MoM.

But Joshilyn, you say, how do you know that the show will establish this fact? HOW DO YOU EVEN KNOW THAT HE IS A FULLY FUNCTIONING MALE ROBOT?

Beloveds, I say back, I know because 1) Look at the actor. Please. He is PAST regular crazy TV show hot and into excessive amounts of wrongful hotness. He is GRATUITOUSLY hot. And more importantly and telling: 2) THE SHOW IS ON FOX.

SomeoneElses BLOG SIZE So, we can assume, yes? Yes. VERY safely. Hot Cop Bot is a fully functioning simulator of all things human. He may not EAT, but I promise you, I know, I am sure, and I would bet my dogs that this robot will be making the sexes before Season 2.

I haven’t seen the pilot yet— we do not have cable—- but I plan to watch it on the internets as soon as I have 60 consecutive minutes. If they do not establish it this episode maybe we can still do the contest.

Did you see it, the pilot? Without spoilering it for me, tell me, is it GOOD? Is it as cheesy and superb as I HOPE WITH ALL MY HOPES? And DO they establish his *cough* possible functions in this ep?

By the way, in case I did not mention it for 15 consecutive seconds, SELS COMES OUT TOMORROW.

That means….TODAY IS THE LAST DAY FOR THE VIRTUAL BOOK TOUR. *panic* *run in circles* *scream*

No, no, do not panic or run in circles or scream. I will do all that. I AM doing all that. You? All YOU have to do is PARTICIPATE *beam*.

The VIRTUAL BOOK TOUR is explained here if you do not know what that is—Plus you can see all the FUN PRIZE DRAWING LOOTS for participants! And I dearly deeply wish you would tweet or facebook or email this page here to ANYONE who might not know or might have forgotten because it is the LAST DAY. I am packing my crazy ugly shoes! I am tweezing my eyebrows! BOOK LAUNCH TOMORROW.

14 comments to RECREATIONAL ROBOTS and PS You Are Invited

  • You are going to be at Alabama Book Smith tomorrow (where I first met you & Beautiful Maisy Who Was Still Small At The Time took my picture with my digital camera until Scott made Scottly “YOU ARE RUINING MY WELL-RAISED CHILD AND PROBABLY ALSO PLANNING TO STALK MY HOT AUTHOR BABY WIFE” eyewrinkles at Maisy & I. Oh, and Sam signed my book, which I thought then & still think now Is Teh Coolest. Also I brought you Anti Elf spray to desmellify litterous boxes!
    At any rate. I live outside of Nashville now but I’m off tomorrow & I can’t think of anything that would be more fun than an Alabama road trip to see my favorite authoress/Mangolover.

  • Oops that was BABE. Hot Author Babe Wife.

  • Marla

    The show is SO GOOD. You’re going to love it, and I think you are on to something with your theories (nothing is established DIRECTLY but…well, I am pretty sure you’re right. Also I hope you are).

  • DebR

    Aaaarrrggghhh, I meant to set the DVR to record that show, but I was busy when I thought of it and then I forgot!! That means I’m going to have to find time to watch it online at some point too, since I really want to see the pilot! Yay for Book Launch a GO!!

  • Almost Human’s pilot episode was awesome. They did not mention if he had working parts or not but the previews for the next episode was all about a bot sex trade where female bots were being pimped out. How did you know?

  • Oh, and my copy of SELS is going to be automatically downloaded, and I am so looking forward to listening to the audio version when I drive back and forth to work this week. :0)

  • YAY Linda!!!! I hope you enjpy the audio, and the answer is SIMPLE — because it is on FOX. :D Seriously. YOU KNOW FOX is goign to go there. No question.!

    YAY Elena I look forward to seeing you again!

    ALSO FELLOW SEX BOT FANS (that sounded wrong. erm UM, fellow interested parties? Yes. Better. JILL WADE just sent me a pic of an AD inher feed for the show that SAYS SEX BOY IN IT> I will try to post it later, riunnign otu the door yto yoga now lest my brain explode from one day before release day terror.

  • Linda J

    I have been on a cleaning spree this weekend just to make sure nothing will be too badly neglected if I sit around listening to a new awesome audiobook for the next few days. So eager for tomorrow. 5 months of waiting has all lead up to tomorrow and it sure is taking its time getting here!!!

  • First, can’t wait for SELS tomorrow.

    Second, I’ll take a stab at your contest. Because these are important questions that need to be answered and because I love tacky. Pretty sure I’m secretly related to Minnie Pearl somewhere. So, here goes…

    Approach & broach: Kennex and Dorian are on stakeout in Season One and Kennex gives a manly “So are you…? Can you…?” Man bot give the chin up sign for “Uh, yeah.” Bam! Budding bromance established.

    Cover: Clearly the bionic partner must in working order in case he has to go undercover. Deeply undercover(s)–pun so fully intended. Since he’s an android, no one has any moral qualms about this. Except Kennex who will, of course, have to have some kind of man-crisis about it during season two sweeps. Will he, or won’t he let the android do the deed? (Thousands of female viewers cry, “Join him, McCoy!”)

    Establish: Somewhere along the end of season three when they completely jump the shark and the writers are out of ideas, then they will do the “Magic Mike” episode that will prove, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that man bot is no Ken Doll. And that he’s programmed to make James Bond look like a piker.

    So there’s my prediction. Because it’s Fox. I also predict a smoking hot girl android. Maybe some android on android action. Or maybe she goes for McCoy and that makes the manbot feel….jealousy.

  • Seriously. This is why being a teacher flat out stinks. I BARELY just got home, then I had to call parents of miscreants, then I FINALLY clicked on the blog and I missed your thingy up there with the picture. Peedaddle!!!!! It was SO not worth it to make those phone calls for awful behavior for my sub on Friday, because the a.p. who is assigned to my grade does not often deal the punishment that is deserved. And I MISSED your thingy. Not that I would have made it, but still.

    BOOK DAY TOMORROW!!!!!!!

  • Lora Wentzel

    Urghhh! Watched Almost Human with the 5th grader, who has not had Family Life yet. He had some interesting questions about why sex bots exist. (Ummm, hello, it was 8:00 pm?!)
    However, I just wanted to say, you look SMOKIN’ in that picture! Rock it, guurrrl!

  • Jenny

    I do not watch this show, but here is how I am convinced the situation will play out. Hot bot man will get his systems hacked by an exotically beautiful and intelligent woman. Instead of doing his cop-ly duties, he will be reprogrammed to do only that which the spy lady wants. Of course, his buddies will “rescue” him, but the memory will remain even after the system patches are in place…

    (Is this a bad place to point out that, on Trek, someone just up and asked the greenish bot if he was “fully functional” and it turned out there were many pre-programmed, er, options?)

  • Brigitte

    Ha, Jenny, I was going to say they’d copy Star Trek TNG too!

  • Almost Human was really very good, but I am a little bit of a Karl Urban fangirl so there’s that. I think there are various kinds of bots with various kinds of programs to do various kinds of things. In the second episode ever, they immediately jump on the sex bot trade so I believe that answers the question about whether or not the bots have functional fun parts. As to whether hot bot cop guy with a heart has these parts, well. Who’s to say. It is FOX, but it’s also JJ Abrams and that dude knows his sci-fi and his shows tend to not be all caught up in the sex thing, generally speaking.