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THANK YOU for the movetastic advice. I have actually cut and pasted bits into a list TO DO. Also thank you for the reassurance and cavalcade of voices shouting at me to drink liquor. You are wise! I bourbonically concur!


So the publicist in charge of WEDDING CAKE FOR BREAKFAST has ponied up two copies of this smart anthology.

YOU WANT THIS – Shelf Awareness says, “Wedding Cake for Breakfast proves a delight to read, whether you are newly engaged, newlywed or just celebrated your 50th anniversary. Or, of course, if you are just looking for a gift for your next bridal shower.” I have been reading it myelf in tiny bites, one essay at a time in between hurling everything I own into boxes; some are familiar enough to make me cackle in recognition, some are freshly foreign to my experience, and they range from hilarious to genuinely touching…it’s a really good diverse group of voices. You will like it. You should win it.

Also…Know anyone engaged or newlyweeded or celebrating a first anniversary? Perfect gift, just sayin’.

SO, you need to be in the US, and the contest runs from NOW until Tuesday the 15th I will let our DEAR OLD NEMESIS, that sucktastic, kitten-hating, viscous fluid filled, sludge-souled, pompous boor, the RANDOM NUMBER GENERATOR pick the two winners for these copies, and here is how to get your name in the drawing up to FOUR times.

1) Leave a comment here saying you want to win it. Or saying SCALLOPS! Or saying your brightest most secret shining hopes for the future. Or explaining what really did happen on the beach all those years ago when cousin Violette disappeared…whatever. Leave ONE comment, you are entered once into the drawing.

2) Link to this contest on your blog, and leave a comment here saying you have done so.

3) Link to this contest on your facebook, and leave a comment here saying you have done so.

4) Tweet a link to this contest on the tweeter and leave a comment here saying you have done so.

So yes, to enter 4 times you will have left 4 comments, and the NUMBERS of those comments will be your drawing numbers.

OKAY! but say you are not lucky. But you are a big COMPETITIVE SMARTIPANTS. Here is an alternative route! Well if you look over HERE you will see the delightful genius who penned SHINE SHINE SHINE, Lydia Netzer, has been married now fifteen years. Her marriage can DRIVE come next year. (Neener-NA, mine can vote!)

After you read her smart and funny essay about 15 ways to stay married for 15 years come back here and enter. If you wish to stay married for MORE than 15 years, you may need to seek supplemental advice…

THE ENTERING, why! It is so easy! Just shoot me an email and title it CONTEST ENTRY. In the email, tell me the best or worst tip for a good marriage you have ever heard (or read or invented). Extra points if you applied it with disastrous or delightful results. WARNING: I will compile the best of these into a blog entry, so CHANGE THE NAMES OF ANY MISCREANTS in your tales of marital adviseyness! Entering this means you are sending a thing you do not mind seeing on the blog. The one I find most amusing or awful or truthful, well, I will pick it, and I will send a copy of the book to that person my OWN self.

REMEMBER THESE ENTRIES MUST COME IN AN EMAIL NOT IN COMMENTS! Comments are disqualified. Only emails considered! And if you do not title it CONTEST ENTRY it may accidentally get lost and accidentally lost ones are disqualified, too, on account of me having no memory of them existing.

By the way, you do not have to be married to enter – I remember getting advice on how to have a good marriage when I was ten. So.

108 comments to CONTESTICA!

  • If I win, I will read it and then I’ll probably still never get married, but I’ll gift it to the bestie because she gets married in a month!!!

  • Wanna win! Wanna wanna win!

  • stephanie

    our 5th wedding anniversary is this saturday, may 12th. this would make a great present..

  • Rikki

    I would please like to be entered into this contest.

  • This sounds like a wonderful anthology! I’d love to be entered.

  • SCALLOPS! Which I happen to love, but not as much as I’d love this book!

  • kylad

    I would like to win even though I was distracted by bourbonically.

  • Tamara

    I want to win 🙂

  • I wanna win. I’m not admiting to anything that might or might not have happened on the beach….

  • I am currently planning my wedding for May of next year. I’m not actually engaged yet — he has some big exciting proposal planned for some unspecified date that would apparently not allow us enough time to plan our wedding for the date we want, so we figured we might as well plan now, and he can give me my grandmother’s ring that is sitting in a drawer waiting later. Luckily, this does not stop us from eating free cake at cake testings. Best part of wedding planning, hands down. But this book might knock free cake down to second place…

  • Aimee

    Yes, please! My eighth anniversary is coming up, and I think this would make a lovely pre-anniversary gift. RNG, be! my! friend!

  • Julie

    We are celebrating our 16th anniversary today! And my husband’s FB status this morning was “Our marriage is old enough to drive (good, now I don’t have to)”! So I think I should win because a) it’s my anniversary and b) great minds think alike!

  • Chocolate ganache

    I have the other anthology you participated in, “Don’t Quit Your Day Job.”It needs a companion volume.

  • Chocolateganache

    I linked on FB!

  • recently discovered you (through someone on Goodreads) and would love to win a copy of the book. Scallops!

  • I have left a link to this here page and the Wedding Cake link both on my FB update. Were these the correct links to leave?

  • I NEED to win this book because a) I just got married in January and b) I am also expecting our first child in October! So my first year as a newlywed has been an adventure — I need lots of laughs, which it seems this book would provide!

  • My husband and I celebrate our 3rd wedding anniversary in a couple of weeks. Still – I think this book would be a great read!

    I read the essay by Lydia Netzer when you posted it on Facebook – what a great read!

  • Jo

    I would love to read this book. I have been married 22 years.

  • I tweeted about it (although I tried to discourage participation, the better to win): https://twitter.com/#!/joannamcneal/status/200698533089787905

  • I posted a link on Facebook, but I have no idea how to link to one particular FB status… But we’re friends, so I guess you could see it if necessary? I hope so! Thanks for offering this contest (& for being an all-around awesome author and blogger)!

  • Jessica (the celt)

    We will be celebrating our marriage’s entry into first grade (6 yrs) on May 27. Every day I look at my husband and hope he doesn’t realize how much luckier I am than he is. ;~)


    I want to win it.


    My most secret hopes for the future are quietly waiting in the corner to spring out at me, I hope, and I don’t want them to know that I see them and scare them off, so I’m not going to say anything out loud. They are silver and shiny and have the most beautiful lavender feathers on their wings!

    You won’t believe me, since I was the only one who saw and I was only four at the time, but Cousin Violet didn’t disappear! Well, I mean, she did disappear, but she’s still HERE. As an only child, she decided to live with us when she “went invisible,” so she could have someone to play with (her parents kept ignoring her anyway). I keep telling you every time you stumble over the sleeping bag in the hallway or step on those pointy toys left in the living room that Cousin Violet is using those at night, but you never believe me. Why can’t someone just believe me?!

  • Kelly

    It could happen, I might be lucky enough to win!( flaps arms in a slow up and down motion)

  • Haley

    It sounds really interesting to me. I feel like I was never exposed to truly good marriages growing up, so I am always curious about what marriage might be like.

  • Karen

    My marriage will be able to drink legally next year.

  • Karen

    I tweeted the contest so scallops can enjoy it.

  • Karen

    I posted this on my Facebook twice because I am impatient and hit buttons repeatedly.

  • Carol

    SCALLOPS! That is all.

  • You realize that the alt text on the wedding photo is “ftk Lydia as a fetus”? :cracks up:

  • And I tweeted! :chirps:

  • Oh my how I would like to win this. Thank you for the chance.

  • I’d love to win this – I think it would make a great gift for a friend who just got married.

  • Valerie

    I hate scallops. sorry. I’ve come through two failed marriages, so I don’t think you want my advice. HOWEVER! My mother always told me (married to my Diddy til death did they part – that’s almost 40 years), “you had better find a man that is darn near perfect, baby girl, because once you marry them, THEY GET WORSE.” This one is actually the truest piece of advice I received. Whatever they are before you marry them, THEY GET WORSE. We don’t. We stay blissfully and ever so ignorantly accelerating into our female chakras at a rapid, steady rate. 😉

  • […] But wait! There’s more! You guys know how much I love Joshilyn Jackson, right? (Click the reading tab and probably half the posts at least reference her. Yeah. Favoritest author.) She, too, is in a recent anthology, WEDDING CAKE FOR BREAKFAST. It’s about the first year of marriage. I gobbled her contribution up the day the book came out. It’s called “The Marry Boy” and it’s adorable and sweet. It makes my heart squish and I don’t feel like a curmudgeony divorcee. Don’t you want your heart to be all squishy? You do? Great, cos Joss is giving copies of this one away here. […]

  • ANNNND it’ll be on my blog tomorrow for Book of the Month round-up. 😀 😀 😀 😀

  • Jessica

    Woo-hoo!! Scallops!

  • Lora in Florida

    My marriage is old enough to go to college…

  • elizabeth

    SCALLOPS!!! I wish I could eat them. But I’d vomit 13 times. So you guys enjoy them, OK?

  • ‘Tis a link on my blog.

  • ‘Tis a link on Facebook.

    I do not tweet.

    My marriage will be a college sophomore in June.

  • Amy

    Oooh! Oooh! I want a copy!
    My marriage will be one on Monday.

  • October will herald my 15th year of marriage. I am more amazed at my husband than I was when I was dating him. I would LOVE a book dedicated to how awesome partners in life are. Yes.

    Oh, and ESCARPMENT.

  • Linda J

    A secret? My secrets hurt now, but first a wish, I wish I had a friend to tell my secrets to.

  • Ashley

    Coming up on wedding anniversary 3 this summer, and I would like to hear other people’s stories! I’d love a copy 🙂

  • Ashley

    I just linked on my Twitter account (@LittleRunkle)!

  • Kathy

    The book sounds wonderful! Sure would like to win it.

  • Chris of the Woodwork

    Hot. Fudge. Sundaes.

    Many and frequent.

    Also, the “never go to bed angry” advice I was going to give???


    (Which in and of itself is such a descriptive term. I mean, how many hogs has anyone ever washed? And is it an automatice thingy, like a car wash, where you put the quarters in and brushes and squirts of soapy water come out to scrub? Food for thought.)

  • Tamara

    Have been spreading the word on twitter about this contest. 🙂

  • Ooh, what wonderful timing – our anniversary is coming up in about a month! Can’t wait for the eventual blog with everyone’s good (or not so good) advice. 🙂

  • in the vein of vivisectionalsofa, scallopearedbunnies!

  • Tamara

    Posted your contest to my blog travelingwitht

  • posted on facebook 🙂

  • Not an entry, but a belated precursory welcome to DECATUR! We’ll be being neighbors soon. Get in touch when settled or even if un-, we can talk schools, restaurants, pool clubs, places to shop, hang, etc. Even writing. Anything.

    Friend and fan,
    Jim H.

  • Kacie

    I would love to read this book. We’re 6 months in and I think it would be neat to save and read on our anniversary. Count me in!

  • Lulu

    SCALLOPS! perfectly seared, served over fragrant jasmine rice and …wait, what are we doing here? Oh, contest! Bookish prizes!
    I’m still wedded, ever since 1981…the math hurts at this point. But helpful hints/good stories are always appreciated, and may contribute to my continued marital happiness & satisfaction, if not bliss.

  • Lulu

    Tweeted, too!

  • Limerick

    I want to win. But I am not very lucky. Except in the husband department. He is awesome and cooks scallops for me at least once a month.

  • Lashonne

    Oh SCALLOPS! How I want to win, and all I remember from the night Violet disappeared from the beach was the brilliant flash of light and POOF she was gone. The End.

  • Billie

    My anniversary is tomorrow as well Stephanie!! It’s my 6th anniversary!! I could totally use this book as we are hitting a rut with a tween who has ADHD and a 2 and 4 year old. Sports, appointments, etc makes it so that we don’t have much time for ourselves let alone each other. by the way, I want to win! SCALLOPS. 🙂

  • BerniG

    Scallops! I’d like to enter, pretty please with sparkly sugar on top! I’ll be married for 8 tears next month. It’s the second time around for both my husband and myself. We were each married for ten years the first time in horrible marriages. It’s made us appreciate the good thing we have so much more.

  • Laura F

    My marriage turns 20 this year. Would love this book!

  • Gina

    I would love to win! Scallops!

  • KimberlyHdM

    Scallops I say, and your little book too, my pretty RNG!

  • Allison in Denver

    Mussels over scallops but the book sounds great!

  • Scallops! Except I hate seafood. And I’m pregnant so I don’t even like some foods that I normally love right now. Considering the time of year and my crazy fresh fruit cravings, perhaps I should instead say: Strawberries!

  • edj

    scallops! onions! Thai peanut sauce! I hope I win! Pick me! I’ll be back…

  • redzils

    SCALLOPS! Yummy Kodiak sea scallops, with pasta… Probably they are about as delicious as this book…

  • Aimee

    I posted to my Facebook page, too!

  • DebR

    I’d like to win please!! Pleeeeease!!

  • isapie

    I want to win! me! me! me! My marriage turns 5 this year… it is almost as mature as a kindergartener.

  • Christina

    Scallops! My marriage will be five in September.

  • Debby

    I would love to win!!! And I posted in fb. 🙂

  • And I blogged it. 🙂

  • Amber

    My shelves need more books.

  • Amber

    And the contest, it is on my Twitter.

  • Amber

    And Twitter posted it to Facebook. Universe wants me to win

  • Pamela L

    I would love to win this – even if I don’t, I will get it and read as I love all the tales of marriages that are touching or funny or whatever. It sounds delightful. Thanks for this opportunity.

  • No, seriously, I have linked to the Book of Face and Twitter. If only I could think of wedding advice for the other one….I must not have listened to any of it. That sounds about right. Must be doing something right based on the glory that was Mother’s Day yesterday.

  • Melissa

    My anniversary is May 15th 🙂 Also, scallops.

  • Melissa

    Posted on fb

  • Melissa

    Twitter too!

  • ailo

    Hmmm, I’m gonna have to get this for my best friend who’s getting married in the fall. I bet it’s hilarious.

  • Is there anything more awesome than free books?

  • Me, me, me! Yes, please:)

  • Christine

    This book sounds fabulous. I can’t wait to read it whether I win it or not (although I would love to win a copy). I cant wait to read your compilation of marriage advice . . . 18 years of marriage and I still need all the help I can get.

  • Caleb

    Having celebrated 7 years of marriage, I would like to win this book so maybe I can understand why people in North Carolina would passed a law trying to keep others from enjoying what I have found to be basically tedious boredom…

  • Caleb

    Scalloped you on Facebook!

  • Caleb

    Twatted on tweeter like a twit!

  • Ray

    Oh sure. NOW the comments work. But you replied to me! You really really like me!

  • Ray

    Pimped to the Facebook, I meant to say:)

  • Jessica

    I loved your dog post about Bagel and would love to read this!

  • Lainey

    It sounds great! Pick me!

  • Katie Hartsell

    Scallops! No, Lobster! No, Bacon! Wait, all 3 together!
    Seriously I WANT this book. The end.