|
I have decided to live to be exactly 88, at which point I will drop dead onto the tarmac. I plan to have wispy tufts of lavender hair not actually covering much of my shiny smooth cap of scalp. I will be sporting a generous dollop of crooked-y pink lipstick, some on my lips and [...]  There’s are couple of weird things that happen when you stop blogging for a little—or a lot. 1) First, you HATE to read those “why I have not been blogging” entries by other people, because they are not very interesting, and they seem to imply a certain HOW HAVE YOU MANAGED WITHOUT ME [...]
This turnip is experiencing anticipation and hopeful love. Or it is a stalker. I am about as self actualized as your average turnip. That may not be fair to turnips. Perhaps your AVERAGE turnip sits around thinking, “I am crunchy! I am wholesome! My nature is serene root-vegetable-y-ness. I understand my potential [...] My best beloveds have essentially asked me, “Joss, why are you so bat-crap crazy, crapping crazy bats?” In lieu of a straight answer, I give you a list of reasons why it is bad to schedule your life via a sacred paper calendar: 1) Rememer that superfun day when I lost the sacred Paper [...] I need to re-invigorate my soil. I hate gardening, so I fervently wish this was a metaphor. It is not. Here you see a pretty picture of the loamy dirt bed outside my office. It is rife with azaleas. I show you this to make it less humiliating to show you the NEXT [...] |
|
|
Copyright © 2013 Faster Than Kudzu - All Rights Reserved |
||