Comments: TSTL

Thus Saith the Lord? That's what I got when I googled it.... :)

Posted by Leandra at February 2, 2007 6:26 AM

I must confess I do not know, but it reminds of something at work TOTALSYS, for some reason everyone pronounces it "teet-sis", which makes me think of the tse-tse fly, and isn't that the one in Africa that bites with the sleeping sickness?--mercifully ends series of digression to go wash son's vomitous sheets. And blankets. And pillowcases. He's NINE and STILL can't throw up in the toilet. Gonna be a biiig hit at frat parties someday, I can see it.

Posted by Elena at February 2, 2007 7:40 AM

too stupid to live?
am I close?
can I have one of those little foxes now?

Posted by Dianna at February 2, 2007 8:04 AM

Well, I was gonna say "Too Stupid To Live," based on earlier blog entries, but now I've decided it must be: Thus Said The Lord, "Thou art Too Stupid To live." Um, followed of course by a huge thunderclap as I am struck by lightning. Heh.

Disclaimer: "heh" Appropriated directly from our dear sweet Joss her very own self.

Posted by David at February 2, 2007 8:43 AM

Glad Max could assist you in this moment of humilation. Remeber how he turned off the switch to the fan on the furnice and caused me to call a repair man. He is indeed a dreadful baby!

Posted by Julie at February 2, 2007 8:54 AM

Ah, yes . . . the dreadful baby. I'm glad I had my own DB first, so now any subsequent NON-DBs will be a pleasant surprise and not likely to sneak up on me after years of normal-baby bliss.

I love how Bagel has to look at what he's sniffing, as if he wouldn't recognize that awful smell if his eyes were closed.

Posted by Michelle at February 2, 2007 9:45 AM

I love that you have a pet chair. Complete with side scratch post for Shubert!

My Rocky gets all irritable if I dump clean laundry in "his" chair, so he rolls around on it and gets it all dirty and hairy so I have to wash it again. Then he sharpens his claws on one of my bras. He's awfully cute though.

Posted by Edgy Mama at February 2, 2007 9:51 AM

Diana got it first. But I've no doubt been it longer. I'm the one who calls the electrician after checking the circuit breaker, has him come out, and charges me 100 bucks to jiggle the breaker once from on to off and back again. I've driven hundreds of miles in a raging snowstorm before it finally dawned on me that we have, after all, invented the telephone and could call ahead to see if the place on the other end is actually open. "Obvious" is not my place in the dictionary.

This entry, btw, is my first sighting of Schubert aka Rotundo the Land Whale. I'd behave myself, too, if I were that dog.

Posted by ray at February 2, 2007 10:10 AM

Too Stupid To Live, generally used to describe the sort of character in books and/or movies who knows there's a crazed psycho killer on the loose, yet still thinks it's a good idea to wander into a dark, creepy basement by herself while wearing a skimpy nightie, at a moment when no one else knows where she is.

Hey, Joss, at least you had the excuse of a baby visitor! My husband has gone into factories run by supposedly grown-up people, where entire production lines had been shut down for hours, and solved the "problem" by plugging in one wire or flipping one switch. So it's not like you're the first or the last! :-)

Posted by DebR at February 2, 2007 11:04 AM

Okay, my mind didn't play this trick the first time through, but how many other readers' dirty minds grabbed the capitalized word out of the second line, mentally inserted it into the first, and got

I HAVE NOT HAD INTERCOURSE FOR TWO DAYS NOW

?

That would be filed under TMI, which is on the page before TSTL.

Posted by ray at February 2, 2007 11:20 AM

That is one big cat. I KNOW you've told us that before, but seeing him in relation to the big, comfy chair that makes me sneeze even looking at in online since I am HORRIBLY allergic to both cats AND dogs, just makes him seem as HUGE as I'm sure he is in real life.

Posted by Roxanne at February 2, 2007 11:52 AM

My nephew was not a DB but, right before he'd attempt to do something bad, he'd say, "You no see me."

I like how Shubert and the Bagel are color coordinated. It would have been no good if you had brought home, say, a purple dog.

Posted by Jenny G. at February 2, 2007 12:23 PM

Shall I tell my own TSTL story to make you feel better? Rental house, light in kitchen goes out. Replace light bulb, light still doesn't work. Call landlord's handyman, he comes out, changes the light bulb for one that ISN'T a dead bulb that I so cleverly put back in the cardboard sleeve (to keep it from breaking in the trash) and then placed back in the closet. TADA! Light magically works but now I am, officially, TSTL.

Posted by Carrie (in MN) at February 2, 2007 12:38 PM

Dear Joss, you are definitely not TSTL. You are an author on overload with TOGWISS. And it was cosmically bad timing that the cable system chose that moment to go out in your area. What else were you supposed to think?

Glad to see Schubert and Bagel have a truce.

Posted by Elizabeth at February 2, 2007 1:11 PM

too stupid to live. Often used to describe heroine's in romance novels.

Posted by megan at February 2, 2007 1:22 PM

The Sky is The Limit
Thruster Selection & Timing Logic
Thread Safe Template Library
Totally Spaced, Truly Loaded

oh - Too Stupid to Live.

Posted by bob at February 2, 2007 1:57 PM

Oh, please don't feel TSTL. I once spent hours mystified by the TV--I had no idea what button my HT (Holy Terror) had pushed to make it Not Work and I REALLY needed PBS Kids on the TV right then. And even without anyone messing with the DVD player, I still don't really know how it works. I basically just push buttons until something happens. You've no idea the pressure, when a kid really wants his DVD and Mama is the Idiot who can't work the machine.

Plus, my toaster oven caught on fire last week. There, feel better?

Posted by amy at February 2, 2007 3:30 PM

Well everyone else already hit it, and isn't it sad how many of us have our own evidence of same? The story is too long, but let me just say it includes the following highlights:

Oven full of flaming salmon
Bowl of available water
Exploding potato
Singed left eyebrow, and not my eyebrow.

Do not EVER come to my house for dinner.

Posted by Femtastic at February 2, 2007 3:35 PM

I'm sure other people's TSTL stories are making you feel better, so:

We moved into a new building at work. And in the first weeks there was some adjusting, getting our phones and internet hooked up, moving plugs to where we wanted them to be, etc.

One day I discovered that neither my phone NOR my internet worked. I tried unplugging the phone and using someone else's phone to see if there was a problem. I tried all sorts of things. I complained to everyone. Finally, after about a week, they brought a guy from the phone company in to look into the problem in my office.

15 seconds after walking into my office he pointed out that the inputs for the phone and internet had "D" for Data (internet) and "V" for Voice (phone) clearly labelled on them. At some point I had unplugged them both and plugged them back into the wrong sockets.

He promised not to tell any of my co-workers the reason for the service call.

Posted by TrudyJ at February 2, 2007 4:10 PM

The male dog and the tuxedo cat at my house? Hate each other. Dog is blind and walks towards cat ALOT, cat hisses, dog lunges, vases get broken. *sigh*

Posted by Liise at February 2, 2007 5:26 PM

Ha! We had that baby! We called him Baby Deathwish, he had no fear of anything, anywhere, ever. He got through the security checkpoint at Heathrow airport once, and I didn't have the right kind of ticket, so he had to be brought back to me by a VERY irritated British security dude.

Good times, good times.

Posted by alala at February 2, 2007 5:30 PM

Oh thank heavens, menopausal senility is setting in and I am forgetting my past TSTL indiscressions, all benefits of my formerly Totally Spaced, Truly Loaded. (thank you Bob)

Joss love the chair, true animal people know the following...
1) their pets own them
2) their pets are family members
3) their pets always win

Posted by Cele at February 3, 2007 12:47 PM

Well, you have to admit, when I said TRUFFLES and you didn't immediately go out and murder someone, it looked suspicious about the comment-reading. But my suspicions almost immediately turned to Bagel and the possibility that he might be a cable-chewer, which turns out to be maligning him but not Baby Knievel.

Posted by Laura Florand at February 4, 2007 8:20 AM

Love the picture!

Posted by Lynne at February 4, 2007 10:02 AM

TSTL...yep, that would be me!

Once upon a time at my workplace, there was an Extremely Unhelpful IT Guy (EUITG) and a Relatively Innocuous Building Manager (RIBM).

I had not been able to persuade my scanner to work for a space several days. Restarting Photoshop did not work. Restarting the computer did not work. Going through the troubleshooting checklist that we all had to perform on our own before daring to antagonize the EUITG with an actual request for assistance did not work.

In despair, I finally admitted my technical difficulties to my own manager, since using everyone else's scanner to get my work done wasn't making me any friends. Luckily, she said something to the RIBM, who paused by my desk that day.

RIBM: So, I hear you have scanner problems?

Me: Yes. Big scanner troubles. It does this (insert description of error), and I have done this (insert laundry list of troubleshooting), and (insert most dramatic sigh and pitiful look) it doesn't work at all!!!

RIBM: Is your scanner plugged in?

Me: Well, of COURSE it's plugged in! Why wouldn't it be! Look, see? Right there! It's....it's....it's.....

RIBM:......

Me: I'll just plug this in right now.

RIBM walks away, very amused, and I nevereverevereverever live it down. At least it was not the EUITG, because he might have fed me to the demons in the basement as a sacrifice to stupidity.

Posted by Jessica at February 5, 2007 2:05 PM

Too stupid to live. I know because I frequently am.
You realize I live with the Wilson version of Dreadful Baby? And that Julie's version is coming to visit? And that I am fairly sure the two of them will find a way to burn down my house while I'm in the shower? And that even so I cannot wait for their arrival?
Smear Bagel all over with Eau de Shrimp. Schubert may begin to see his better side.

Posted by Amy-Go at February 10, 2007 2:50 PM