Comments: The End of the Jail Saga....Part 3

Um, if it's worth anything at all (and it probably isn't) I Got It all along that you didn't do anything wrong and it was all a huge, messy, stupid, typically-government clerical error. I think what's stupid is that the law has been changed so that the cops aren't allowed to use their brains to figure out if they can tell the difference between terrorists and law-abiding writer moms before having to arrest someone. That's beyond ridiculous.

I will be sending hopeful good thoughts that the charges were never filed and the Bad Day doesn't exist on paper. And I'll be sending somewhat vindictive (but still good) thoughts that your lawsuit against the DMV is a resounding victory for you, with them not only paying eveything they should but also sending you an extremely abject written apology. (Personally, I think the person responsible should have to grovel and give you daily pedicures for a few weeks, but hey, that's me.)

You don't look bad to anyone with any sense.

You're pretty.

Posted by DebR at August 13, 2006 2:00 PM

Oh Joss, you are so so so very Pretty!
I know that doesn't help, but I'm going for a theme here. WE all know that you didn't do anything wrong, AS IF YOU EVER WOULD!! It's just those stupid DMV people. Trust me, we know how the DMV is. They are BAD. BADBADBAD. And you should sue them.
No, I'm not being sarcastic at all. I am totally serious. I had something similar happen to me, involving a ticket for a non-moving violation THAT I PAID. But DMV screwed up and canceled my license, without letting me know it was cancelled. So i drove on that BAD thing for 6 months, until my insurance company told me that I was violating the law and had been for months. The DMV acted like it was MY fault that THEY screwed up. Evidently, I was supposed to notify them that the ticket had been paid, because they don't check on things like that before they cancel your driving priveleges. Hmmm. I had no idea they were so incompetent. It took weeks, and lots of paper, to straighten out. Glad yours was less time.

Posted by dee at August 13, 2006 4:04 PM

Peach, I think you're missing the bigger picture here, and certainly the most important question.

See, now you have all this street cred and you can parlay that into a FABULOUS book which will, of course, become an overnight bestseller, and which will then become a HUGE movie!

Now, we know that Johnny Depp is going to play Scott and come to your rescue, probably in some sort of hot muscle car, but here's the really big question:

Who's going to play YOU in the movie?

Posted by Fran at August 13, 2006 4:51 PM

Dear Joshilyn,

NVDL and DWLS are traffic misdemeanors according to Florida's state attorney's office - with a bond of $250. The only people they ACTUALLY ARREST for said offenses here are either in the country illegally or "ridin' dirty".

Let 'em blame the patriot act all they want - you could have been given a notice to appear on the street as long as you had someone pick you up. You could have been given an NTA in the jail. Nobody walks on a warrant or a felony, but probable cause TRAFFIC MISDEMEANORS?

I'm really mad for you now that you've spelled things out more clearly. I hope you made the cops feel ashamed of themselves. Want I should shank 'em?

Posted by Dianna at August 13, 2006 5:00 PM

Well, not FOREVER. :) My arrest was removed. Expunged. If you aren't found guilty of a crime, you can file to have it removed. Especially a false or STOOPID arrest, as yours was.

Posted by Angela Giles Klocke at August 13, 2006 7:53 PM

PS -- right there in GA, by the way. Just a couple counties over, same state govmt.

Posted by Angela Giles Klocke at August 13, 2006 7:53 PM

Um, sweetie? It's not September yet. Do you mean you'd actually been driving on a cancelled license since LAST September, or are you confused about how it is still August? Just curious.

I want to have all the facts right before I write my Unauthorized Biography of a Criminal Novelist. I'm thinking of subtitling it "And I Thought I Knew Her." ;)

Posted by Mir at August 13, 2006 8:03 PM

I don't understand why people can't believe that the gov't actually makes mistakes. I still can't decide if I should be law abiding and go get my social security card changed or not. I really really would not do well in jail. I can hear people saying I always knew she'd end up in jail there's something just not right with that girl. I'm sorry for your trouble.

Posted by kim at August 13, 2006 8:36 PM

Johnny Depp's going to play Scott? Can I play you, Joss? Pretty please?

Damn, damn DMV.

Posted by Edgy Mama at August 13, 2006 9:03 PM

Well, with your fabulous career as a fantastically successful novelist, you should never have to fill out an application that asks "Have you ever been arrested.....".

Maybe you should look up Arlo Guthrie and offer him a sequel to Alice's Restaurant. ...8x10 glossy photographs with arrows and circles around the social security number and date.....

Posted by Bob at August 13, 2006 9:20 PM

I've been to the DMV twice to get my name changed since I got married. I've stood in line for hours and finally had to leave because I couldn't wait anymore. Maybe I should wait to see how long it is before I get arrested.

Posted by InterstellarLass at August 13, 2006 10:23 PM

Joss! And with Scott gone?

How is it you aren't trembling in a closet somewhere, with a three-digit mental quotient? I would be!

Posted by Katrina Stonoff at August 14, 2006 12:54 AM

*pets your hair, even though we've not officially met*

*tuts in the direction of DMV*

*decrees that calorie free virtual Godiva chocolate be available at your every beck and call*

*offer you a pony, in case all of that wasn't enough*

Posted by Angela at August 14, 2006 9:12 AM

Hey, at least you got a Time Machine out of the ordeal. (grin) Seriously, there appears to be a teeny-tiny-microscope glitch in yout timeline of events. When you said...

1) In July of 2005, the DMV sent me a letter, telling me I had to go down to social security and fix my name. I had until September 11 to get it done.
2) On August 20th, I went down to the office and did everything I need to do to get it fixed.
3) On SEPTEMBER 11th, three weeks AFTER I had complied, the DMV canceled my license anyway. Due to THEIR clerical error.

...I suspect that you performed Part 2 on July 20th (today being August 14th, wherein lies the rub), which then causes Part 3 to revert to August 11th, which in turn returns the time-space continuum to its rightful orientation. (Whew! What a relief!)

Posted by CalGal at August 14, 2006 9:13 AM

A. Lordy, people. I know it's Monday morning and all, but Joss says right up there ^ in her entry that it was September 11, 2005! Nearly one year ago. See, we have a September every single year. Years are kinda cool like that.

B. OF COURSE you didn't do anything wrong. The DMV, in every state, no exceptions, hires only people who don't have opposable thumbs. DO NOT WORRY ABOUT IT.

C. Your new air of dark mystery is JUST LOVELY on you. Really. It brings out your eyes.

Posted by Aimee at August 14, 2006 10:26 AM

Dear Joss,

We know that you only truly make stuff up in your novels, but you do tend to, um, color the text of your blogs with writerly artistic paraphrasing. Now that you have calmed down enough to give us the play-by-play details (I would still be hiding in my closet and whimpering), we have a clearer picture of what actually happened.

From Part I, it sounded like you did the paperwork stuff 5 months ago, SS lost the form and set things in motion to issue warrant, and cops sent to your home just as you were set to leave for TV studio because cops told you were a terrorist.

It was ALWAYS clear bureaucrats, NOT you, messed up. I hope you do get an Oprah interview out of this.

So, I guess you did really scratch graffiti on the toliet? Ewww.

"Frickittypoopoo" is my new favorite word.

Posted by Elizabeth at August 14, 2006 11:02 AM

YEAH --- to the best of my memory it had been MONTHS ago, but on Thursday, when Scott and I went to our safety deposit box and to the SS office and DMV and we looked at the papers, I saw it had been almost a year.

I scratched graffiti on the half wall that HID the toilet/sink/drinking fountain thing so you could pee in QUASI private. I did not TOUCH that frickittypoopoo toilet. Because. Ew. *grin*

Posted by Joshilyn at August 14, 2006 11:13 AM

I only mentioned it because I was WORRIED!!! I am so glad that there is not going to be a trial. I could already see it - they would have brought that animal rights activist from the tour in as a character witness - NOT GOOD!!!!

Plus, I REALLY did not want you in jail. If that were to happen your publisher may pull the deal on your next book AND I could NOT stand for that!

Glad it is all going to work out.

Posted by charity_s at August 14, 2006 11:41 AM

The thing about the cops boggling probably had more to do with the fact that you got ANYTHING straightened out in 24 hours more then whether or not they believed you. Although... my husband never believes them... criminals I mean.... unless they have really nice shoes. I kid you not. But it's not like even then he thinks they're innocent. He just thinks they don't necessarily belong doing time. Like having nice shoes is some sort of "Get Out of Jail Free" card.

Posted by Laume at August 14, 2006 2:50 PM

Ahhhh so you want all that taken off your record. I am sure that most men along with Scott like to think their wives have a bit of bad girl in them. In this case I do believe you can get that expunged from your now long criminal record. It would be how much are you willing to spend and does your lawyer have anything to do for a while.

Ol Bob

Posted by Bob in Ms at August 14, 2006 3:06 PM

Laume, I know what you mean. We had a *small* finance issue a few years back, when we were changing our banks. Husband wrote a check on an account that I closed, but he didn't know it. We got the notice that the check had been returned while we were on vacation. We got back and he went down to the store to take care of it, and they told him that the time had expired and he had to go get the check at the jail. When he did, they arrested him, cuffs and all. Then they let him go on his OR. Then he had to show up at court. When he did, the state's atty thought he was counsel for a defendant, because of the way he was dressed. To this day, I know they treated him different because he wore a suit/tie to court that day. He didn't look the part of an 'utterer' or someone that would write bad checks. Funny how looks really do matter sometimes.

Posted by dee at August 14, 2006 3:08 PM

So, the burning question is, when do we get to see your mug shot?
Seriously, glad you've been able to handle this all and not send the MI# too off the charts. Ugh.

Posted by Chris at August 14, 2006 5:23 PM

oh my dear pretty pretty joshilyn. i am so very very sorry for this awful ordeal. i am dearly hoping that it wasn't filed. and of COURSE you did nothing wrong, and anyone that thinks you did has rocks in their brains. YOU, poppet, are beautiful and wonderful.

Posted by kristen at August 14, 2006 5:36 PM

Next time you get arrested, you can call me. Mir will vouch for me, I've been stalking her for a while. (And I'm in Atlanta, more Doraville than Austell, but I'd have driven to Austell. Because you know Mir.)

Posted by carson at August 14, 2006 8:15 PM

looks bad? only to judgemental b**tards.

to those of us who are otherwise minded, though, you just look, well, interesting. (my favorite cocktail is a dirty martini. see what I did there? I used the word "dirty." 'cause it's much, much better that way.)

on the other hand, I'm a dirty non-church-going type, so. ?!

Posted by deb at August 14, 2006 11:43 PM

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/mugshots/joshilynjacksonmug1.html

Posted by Papy Snook at August 15, 2006 12:54 AM

IDJITS!


You're pretty...even in your mugshot. ;)

Posted by Amy-Go at August 15, 2006 11:49 AM

THis reminds me of the time my husband was very nearly arrested for a slew of unpaid parking tickets that he had, in fact, actually paid. Weirder still, the town that issued the warrant couldn't come up with proof of said parking tickets. So he had to trace down the paper trail, cancelled checks, etc.

The DMV sucks.

Posted by Amy at August 15, 2006 6:03 PM

I agree, you look bad only to those who complete and utter idee-yuts.

To them- Say it loud, say it proud...FRICKITTYPOOPOO!

Posted by Mary (mert) at August 16, 2006 3:03 AM

Wow.
That is the most amazing "I didn't really do anything but landed my law abiding citizen butt in jail" story I have ever heard.
Only you could have handled it with this much grace and humor.
I hope it all works out ok - maybe this will pop up in a future book?
Alana

Posted by Alana at August 16, 2006 4:28 PM

Oh Papy, that was wrong. I was all excited to see how pretty she looked, but it was just a joke. SO I guess we have to wait for Joss to post her own miugshot, eh?

Posted by dee at August 16, 2006 4:40 PM

Um, not to be an utterly paranoid freak or anything, but that thing about suing the DMV? Are you sure you want those people mad at you for the rest of your life? I mean, it was bad enough to send you to jail BEFORE you sued them.

That's just something my mom would say, so now I have to say it, too.

Posted by Suebob at August 18, 2006 4:41 PM

I am amazed about the 24 hour thing myself. My license was pulled on the first of April (and no, it was NOT an April Fool's prank) because I have sleep apnea and for some reason the DMV thought that meant I fell asleep without warning. A.P.N.E.A does NOT spell "narcolepsy"!! Sheesh! So they yanked my license and I had to have a review, blah, blah, blah. Gave me back my license on the 17th of April--great! Drove for my job for a month, had surgery, and THEN my boss calls me and says I have no Class B (I drive bus). Finally get a review with the DMV AGAIN on July 5th, only to be told that I had NO LICENSE WHATSOEVER!!! So I can relate to the whole "DMV screwing up my life" thing, Joss!! Been there, done that! Apparently when they rescinded the revocation, they forgot to tell the eensy weensy little fact that they had merely returned my driving PRIVILEDGE--NOT my freaking license!! For that I had to go to DMV and fill out form XYZ and take four written tests and pass my eye exam and THEN I would have my license again!! I am just lucky that *I* didn't land in the hoosegow also! By the way--why exactly did Nice Cop and Hot Cop pull you over in the first place? Racial profiling? Ran your plates? I am curious--did they have a wanted poster on the precinct bulletin board with your picture on it?! LOL!

Posted by Sheri at August 19, 2006 5:18 AM

Friend-of-a-Friend who reads you just passed on this saga. What is wrong with these pictures?

(1) The one you painted.

(2) The one I painted yesterday (click the URL link, since your site strips the HTML linking to it) after reading the news story about the treatment JonBenet's confessed killer "suffered" on his way back from Thailand- business class air transport, clinking champagne glasses with his captor, and dining on pate and king prawn before his court date in LA.

I am at a loss for words, and that's not easy to accomplish.

The books look fascinating, btw, and if anything comes out of this experience it's probably two more readers (me and the missus tend toward the same sort of stuff). With kind permission, I'd also like to sidebar this blog and tell my much smaller cadre of readers about the st00pidity of all this. Most of them buy books, too.

Posted by Ray at August 22, 2006 5:39 PM

Joshilyn,
I'm actually a defense attorney so if you have questions about stuff, I can definitely check it out for you. As far as I can guess without looking at the code books, it shouldn't be too difficult to have your record expunged of the arrest. And yes, in Georgia, they will charge anyone with anything they can come up with. I'm just glad there wasn't anything sketchy in your car.

As for a civil judgment, good luck. Probably won't happen. They don't really consider a few days in jail worth compensating, so I don't expect anything to pan out there. Mostly because if they did that, the state and the counties would run out of money.

So sorry for your trouble, though. I feel your pain to the extent it's possible from sitting on the other side of the glass at the jail.

Also, love your book. :)

Jessica

Posted by Jessica at August 22, 2006 6:15 PM

Joshilyn,
I'm actually a defense attorney so if you have questions about stuff, I can definitely check it out for you. As far as I can guess without looking at the code books, it shouldn't be too difficult to have your record expunged of the arrest. And yes, in Georgia, they will charge anyone with anything they can come up with. I'm just glad there wasn't anything sketchy in your car.

As for a civil judgment, good luck. Probably won't happen. They don't really consider a few days in jail worth compensating, so I don't expect anything to pan out there. Mostly because if they did that, the state and the counties would run out of money.

So sorry for your trouble, though. I feel your pain to the extent it's possible from sitting on the other side of the glass at the jail.

Also, love your book. :) I'm excited for the new one. (Between, GA is actually in my jurisdiction. Whaddya know.)

Jessica

Posted by Jessica at August 22, 2006 6:17 PM